Jun 30, 2013; Pittsburgh, PA, USA; Pittsburgh Pirates fans Allie Teagle (left) and her dad Eric Teagle wait out a rain delay during the second inning between the Milwaukee Brewers and Pittsburgh Pirates at PNC Park. Mandatory Credit: Charles LeClaire-USA TODAY Sports

National Talk Like A Pirate Day: Best (or worst) Pirate Jokes


Apparently today is “Talk Like A Pirate Day?” If you’ve never changed your Facebook language to Pirate you should, it’s fun. It is also confusing as hell, some Pirate lingo isn’t as clear as you’d think it’d be.

Here are some of the best, or possibly worst, pirate jokes in honor of the holiday.

Q: What is a pirate movie rated?

A: Arrrrrrrrrrrrrr

Q: What did the pirate say at the golf course?

A: I may tee.

Q: What is a pirates favorite kind of fish?

A: GOLD-fish

Q: How does a pirate keep his ship clean?

A: He has a yARRRRRd sale

Q: Why does it take a pirate so long to learn the alphabet?

A: Because he spends years at sea.

Q: What is a horny pirate’s worst nightmare?

A: A sunken chest with no booty!

Q: What do Pirates and pimps have in common?

A: They both say “YO HO!” and walk with a limp.

Q: What’s every pirate’s favorite flavor potato chip?

A: Barrrrrrbeque

Q: How much did the pirate pay to get his ears pierced?

A: A Buck-an-ear

Q: What does a pirate call his friends in the military?

A: His ‘Aaaaar Me Mateys’

And lastly:

Sailor to pirate “‘ow did you get your peg leg?”

Pirate: “It got blasted off by a cannon ball!”
Sailor: ”And yer hook?”
Pirate: “It got got chopped off by a cutlass in a fearsome fight!”
Sailor: “And your eye patch?”
Pirate: “Seagull poo.”
Sailor: “Seagull poo? That wouldn’t cause you to loose an eye?”
Pirate: “No, it didn’t, but i’d just had me hook done!”

Tags: Pittsburgh Pirates