If anyone knows really bad puns, it’s me, and what the Miami Marlins have done is pretty bad by most people’s standards. I happen to find them brilliantly bad.
In light of the early National League All-Star vote standings being released, the Miami Marlins decided to encourage the fans using social media by coming up with hash-tag puns. That’s puns in a hash-tag, not #puns.
The first of what is sure to be a string of designed to reel in Fish fans were released on Twitter. The team is using buttons, much like an election campaign, to lure fans into voting for their players. The first ones to be victimized, or immortalized, are first baseman Casey McGehee and outfielder Giancarlo Stanton.
— Miami Marlins (@Marlins) May 29, 2014
As it stands right now, Giancarlo Stanton will need a bit of help if he wishes to scale the standings and be voted in as the starting right fielder for the National League All-Stars. He was sitting at just over 426,000 votes at the time the standings were released and trailed Brewers’ Ryan Braun, Pirates’ Andrew McCutchen, and Rockies’ Charlie Blackmon. Braun and Blackmon are surprise listings in the top three, as the former has been accused (but not convicted) of PED use and the latter is a practical no-name that has been absolutely raking for Colorado.
Stanton is more likely to make the team, either as a starter or as a player-voted reserve. He currently leads the National League in homers with 15 and RBI with 49. McGehee might take a little more convincing, even though the veteran third baseman is hitting .299/.363/.383 in his first year back from Japan. Currently sitting in first place in the third baseman standings is the Rockies’ Nolan Arenado, who is currently on the disabled list.
One can just imagine if Jose Fernandez hadn’t gotten injured, we’d see a #JoseCanYouSee button. Maybe we’ll see #DontCryForMeHechevarria, or #SaltyDog.
Will Marlins fans get hooked on these puns? Will they form a line to vote for their players? Or, like their attendance numbers, will they cause their Marlins to be sinkers in the standings?
If you, the reader, have any terrible/excellent Marlins puns, please submit them below.