The one where Joel Embiid and DeMarcus Cousins pat butts
By Keith Parish
Pour out your eggnog and fill yourself a cuppa as the boys from Fastbreak Breakfast attempt to make sense of the post-yuletide NBA milieu. Breakfast is bantered, mouthguards are spat and butts are patted as a happening holiday hoops session is reviewed in full.
Circumstances conspired against your humble narrators this celebratory season, so we skipped a week, resulting in even more goodies than usual under the proverbial tree. Gifts, grubs and games are reviewed, with the holiest of days for many — especially NBA fans — having come and gone. Thusly, this is a show bursting at the seams, not unlike a youngster’s stocking or, perhaps, Santa squeezing into an underwhelming, monochromatic Christmas jersey.
So before you pop your champagne, let Chuck bring you the chuckles, Jon spew some misanthropy and Keith supply some sorely-needed facts and analysis on the following topics:
- Ghost of podcasts past haunt the boys, as big names from yesteryear have your hosts in an apologetic mood, indeed.
- A quick survey of the enigmatic West and the woeful East
- Perhaps the most painful International Stackhouse of Pancakes Award winner ever! Tears were shed! Teeth were gnashed! Mouthguards were spat!
- 14 feet of butt pats? ‘Nuff said!
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