The ballad of Matt O’Damon, Ireland’s adopted son and Bono’s new neighbor

In case you wanted to know where Matt Damon is these days, he’s over in Ireland living his best life during the pandemic. He’s become a hit over there.

Matt Damon is becoming more Irish by the day.

The Hollywood A-lister apparently has been living on the Emerald Isle since mid-March and he has quickly become Ireland’s new favorite resident, affectionately known now as Matt O’Damon. (O’)Damon was in Ireland to film an upcoming Ridley Scott movie before the whole global pandemic made international travel next to impossible and now he’s just living his best life overseas. How do you like them apples?

According to the New York Times, he has emerged as a well-respected citizen of Dalkey, an affluent suburb of Dublin, living in a rental mansion “just a stone’s throw away from Bono’s”. Damon is clearly stuck in a moment he can’t get out of, but it’s always a beautiful day when you can jog around the Irish countryside in your favorite Boston Red Sox ball cap and not be bothered incessantly.

Perhaps in the British Isles Damon has found what he’s looking for. He’s in a place where the townspeople protect him as one of their own. He could run for mayor of Dalkey and win in a non-election year. That is how much his new adopted hometown loves the guy. But how does Ben Affleck feel about all this?

Either way, finding out Damon is over in Ireland takes the cake over the coolest place on earth a celebrity finds his or herself stranded. It was a pretty high bar to climb, if we’re being honest here. Jay Cutler and Kristin Cavallari were stuck in the Bahamas up until early April. While they were relaxing, Damon was getting ready to star in something fierce from Ridley Scott.

It does not matter what role he plays or how well he plays said role, Damon should be nominated for an Academy Award strictly upon his grace under quaintness along the Irish coast. Damon may not be ethnically Irish, as he’s supposedly English and Scottish, but he’s Irish now. If he comes back to the States with an O-postrophe right in the middle of his name, we’d totally get it.

There are people who say they’ll get better during this pandemic, and then there’s people who do get better like Matt Damon. It’s not a matter of if, but a matter of how good his newfound Irish accent will be when he comes back stateside. In the meantime, if you blast a U2 record loud enough and long enough, you’ll learn how to count to catorce like Bono. Some, two, three, 14!

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