20 bold predictions for the NBA’s second half

Vermin Supreme will place higher in the Democratic Primaries than LeBron James in the MVP voting race

Presidential election season is here, meaning that the country will be exposed to the highest levels of discourse.

That is Vermin Supreme, and people exercised their civic duty and voted for him in the presidential primaries.

From CBS News:

"Vermin Supreme, a boot-wearing, pony-loving political satirist who runs for president every four years, placed fourth in New Hampshire’s Democratic primary election and ultimately received more votes than Republican candidate Jim Gilmore. Supreme got 256 votes Tuesday evening, finishing just behind former Maryland Gov. Martin O’Malley, who attracted 619 votes despite dropping out of the race after the Iowa caucuses. Gilmore, the former Virginia governor and last-place finisher on the Republican side, received just 131 votes."

As evidenced by this video, Mr. Vermin Supreme’s platform rests largely on combating tooth decay, with a secondary emphasis on mandatory organ donation and free ponies. To some, Supreme is at best laughable presidential candidate, and at worst a collectivist tyrant (free ponies = tax dollars to pay for handouts). But he appears to be the ideal candidate for certain members of the nation craving rigid structure, both in tooth enamel and society at large.

Setting aside LeBron James’ Sprite endorsement – a product responsible for a great deal of the country’s tooth decay – and it can easily be seen how these two men are similar. Both wish to exert absolute but benevolent rule over their supposed underlings, and both are likely wearing headgear to cover up balding.

Vermin Supreme finished fourth in New Hampshire, and with a few more primary races being held, it could be seen that he finishes at least fifth on the Democratic side nationwide. For LeBron’s chances in the MVP race, he has the obvious front-runner of Stephen Curry to contend with, along with the Spurs’ Kawhi Leonard, the Pacers’ Paul George and Oklahoma City Thunder teammates Russell Westbrook and Kevin Durant. Even Draymond Green’s versatility has proven invaluable to the Warriors, meaning LeBron could easily be pushed to sixth or seventh in the MVP voting race.

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