Fansided

What each NBA coach would be doing if he wasn’t an NBA coach

By John Buhler

Apr 25, 2017; Houston, TX, USA; Oklahoma City Thunder head coach Billy Donovan coaches against the Houston Rockets in game five of the first round of the 2017 NBA Playoffs at Toyota Center. Mandatory Credit: Thomas B. Shea-USA TODAY Sports
Apr 25, 2017; Houston, TX, USA; Oklahoma City Thunder head coach Billy Donovan coaches against the Houston Rockets in game five of the first round of the 2017 NBA Playoffs at Toyota Center. Mandatory Credit: Thomas B. Shea-USA TODAY Sports /
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May 3, 2017; Cleveland, OH, USA; Toronto Raptors head coach Dwane Casey reacts in the third quarter against the Cleveland Cavaliers in game two of the second round of the 2017 NBA Playoffs at Quicken Loans Arena. Mandatory Credit: David Richard-USA TODAY Sports
May 3, 2017; Cleveland, OH, USA; Toronto Raptors head coach Dwane Casey reacts in the third quarter against the Cleveland Cavaliers in game two of the second round of the 2017 NBA Playoffs at Quicken Loans Arena. Mandatory Credit: David Richard-USA TODAY Sports /

Dwane Casey: The best mailman that Kentucky has ever seen

Dwane Casey is proof that life does come after basketball. He once starred in the backcourt for his home state’s Kentucky Wildcats, winning a championship in 1979. Casey quickly took to coaching and recruiting in the Bluegrass State at Western Kentucky in Bowling Green and later his alma mater in Lexington.

After an unfortunate incident involving $1,000, an envelope and the father of a prized recruit, Casey was banished to the far away land known as Japan. Rather than re-invent himself as a basketball coach, Casey went all-in on understanding managerial processes in manufacturing.

Six years later, he would return to the United States with a black belt in Six Sigma from some company called Mitsubishi. Casey was ready to take his new gig in Memphis at some company called Federal Express to new heights.

Casey would bring efficiency to parcel delivery service to post-Communism Russia. Things were going quite well in Memphis for Casey, until he went all Robinson Crusoe and had to live on an island with only his orange friend Spalding for roughly 11 years.

Casey would eventually be rescued from the Bermuda Triangle. He would try to get back into the swing of things with FedEx, but Casey did miss that whole internet thing while he was on vacation on some Caribbean Island.

FedEx decided to force Casey into early retirement. Today you can find him delivering snail mail in the Greater Lexington area. Everybody waves when Mailman Dwane delivers the post. He’s enjoying life as a semi-retired mailman. Casey is a Lexington legend, but people still have a hard time opening the envelopes he delivers due to the insane amount of tape he uses, because never again.

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