5 Ways any team can beat the Tampa Bay Lightning in the NHL playoffs

4. Change the rules of the game

Everyone with a younger sibling knows how this one works. Losing the game? Change the rules. It’s the ultimate way to ensure victory and a fool-proof plan when it comes to dealing with annoying siblings, cousins or other kids on your block that you don’t like very much. It might be a little more difficult to do this in the NHL, though.

First, the opposing team will need dirt on Mr. Commish, Gary Bettman. The man is about as dull as a wooden steak knife so good luck finding anything bad enough to use as a bribe. The rule change would have to be specific to the Lightning as well, as to not hamper your own chances at winning.

No one named Kucherov is allowed to score or assist on a goal. Any team located in the greater Tampa Bay area may only play hockey with palm leaves instead of sticks. The Lightning are not permitted to play with a goaltender in games of an odd number (they might still win). If the Lightning score six or more goals, their total is divided by two and multiplied by zero. The new score will be what they finish the game with.

This doesn’t seem like a very plausible way to win against the Lightning and it would probably piss off all 17 of their loyal fans. Let’s move on to the next idea.