5 Stages of Grief: How to recognize someone with an NHL postseason problem
By C.L. Kohuss
2. Fake Nice
“Good game, guy,” he posts relentlessly on Twitter.
You wanted him to get over this whole “my team sucks” thing but this isn’t the man you married. He’s turned into “Good game, guy” guy now?
Do you divorce him? Ten minutes ago he was pretending he didn’t even enjoy hockey anymore, and now he’s flooding the opponent’s social media account with disingenuous replies. Two days before that he was talking about going on the Jeffrey Dahmer tour up in Wisconsin which honestly sounds pretty cool but then he bought a steak knife. You two are vegetarians.
Also, it wasn’t a good game. They were swept harder than a school gymnasium. They didn’t even show up for Games 3 and 4. Literally, they canceled their flight. It was on the news.
This is actually the best Stage and here’s why: fake nice extends to YOU. He’s probably going to buy you flowers or chocolate or even take you out somewhere because he can’t handle the pain and loss brewing within his brain like a churning espresso. It’s the best coping mechanism around. He gets to be a real dude and feel better about himself, you get probably whatever the hell you want.
Take advantage. Shoes? Got’em. Another baby? Yes please. Vacation alone for six weeks so you don’t have to hear the sound of grunting when he isn’t happy about his NFL team’s draft choices (These two events are stuck together like PB&J)? Oh lawdy.
Key phrases to look out for:
“Oh for sure! I hope your team wins it all!”
“Yeah he’s definitely one of my favs. Wish we had him on our club.”
“Good luck!”
“Florida hired Coach Q? I gotta’ root for them next season.”