NXT UK recap for June 19, 2019: You wouldn’t Download a Festival

Tracksuit Mafia

Imperium — last week’s winners and the new pillars of NXT UK — hit the ring to re-explain their ethos, which we’ve already heard before. The difference is that this time, THEY ARE IN GLORIOUS MATCHING TRACKSUITS. Black with white trim, each monogrammed with their name, town where they’re from and a little flag of their home country. They’re so good. Aside from the fact that WALTER is wearing Vans and Vans looks ridiculous on a fearsome giant, it’s perfect.

But yeah, an Imperium promo that’s really the same promo aside from the fact that they’re in uniform and Alexander Wolfe is also in the group now. It all really boils down to the point that for them — and stick with me here — the mat is — hold onto your hats — sacred. They’re particularly laying on the “wrestling but make it fascist” ideology again, with Aichner proclaiming that people will respect their values and that they will obey them. Yikes.

Wolfe also gets to explain why he joined up with Imperium, which basically comes down to that the opportunity was there, so he took it. Frankly, considering the only notable things SAnitY did on the main roster was show up without Nikki Cross and lose in their debut match, Wolfe probably would have taken any opportunity for direction he could get, so smart move by Imperium to advertise on WWE Craigslist that they were looking for a fourth.

Then WALTER grabs the mic to call Travis Banks a child even though Banks is older than him by a handful of months. Classic “Ronda Rousey calling Becky Lynch a millennial” faux pas. He then goes on to say that while Banks certainly earned his shot, things will proceed according to Imperium’s wishes.

Because of this apparent loophole where the perceived “top” of the brand can make management kowtow to any of their demands, Johnny Saint makes Travis Banks versus WALTER for the United Kingdom Championship official for next week. In closing, WALTER calls Banks no brave young man — again, he’s a handful of months older — but a fool if he thinks he has any shot at winning.

https://twitter.com/WWEUniverse/status/1141424885391974400

Overall, it was a fine speech, but do we need to this every time Imperium comes out? Do all four of them really need to take turns spending two minutes to say two sentences that rehash what we’ve already come to expect?