Fansided

One New Year’s resolution for every NBA team

By Matt Rutkowski

MOSCOW, RUSSIA - DECEMBER 21, 2017: A woman dressed as the Snow queen uses a mobile phone during the launching of the new Christmas and New Year's Eve themed train at Krasnaya Presnya Depot on Line 5 (Ring Line) of the Moscow Underground; named 'A Journey to Christmas', the new train features characters of fairy tales, sights of Moscow and pictures of winter. Sergei Bobylev/TASS (Photo by Sergei Bobylev\TASS via Getty Images)
MOSCOW, RUSSIA - DECEMBER 21, 2017: A woman dressed as the Snow queen uses a mobile phone during the launching of the new Christmas and New Year's Eve themed train at Krasnaya Presnya Depot on Line 5 (Ring Line) of the Moscow Underground; named 'A Journey to Christmas', the new train features characters of fairy tales, sights of Moscow and pictures of winter. Sergei Bobylev/TASS (Photo by Sergei Bobylev\TASS via Getty Images) /
facebooktwitterreddit
Prev
24 of 30
Next
NEW ORLEANS, LA – NOVEMBER 20: Tony Allen
NEW ORLEANS, LA – NOVEMBER 20: Tony Allen /

New Orleans Pelicans – Appreciate what you have

The New Orleans Pelicans might lose Anthony Davis at the end of this contract, and maybe lose Boogie Cousins as soon as next year. That would suck and all, but that’s not my point. The New Orleans Pelicans employ Tony Allen.

I’m not sure they appreciate what that sentence means. The New Orleans Pelicans employ Tony Allen. This is a big deal. Only one team gets that honor at a time, and the Memphis Grizzlies had been hoarding it for the last few seasons like I hoard party poppers at New Year’s parties so I can make them explode next to people’s ears and laugh and laugh and laugh.

I don’t know if Memphis is stupid or gracious, but they let their employment of Tony Allen lapse this past season, and the Pelicans got him. This was, by any intelligent estimate, the most important thing to happen in basketball since 2001 when the basketball stopped dribbling itself for comic effect.

But Tony Allen has only averaged about 12 minutes per game this season. That’s 36 fewer minutes than he should be averaging.

Have you ever looked at a court that didn’t have Tony Allen and then immediately looked at a court that did have Tony Allen on it? It’s not the same experience. Instead it’s like playing a movie, except you remember to turn your TV on. It’s like eating soup with a spoon instead of a fork. This is what’s missing.

The season isn’t over yet, so if the Pelicans play enough overtimes maybe they can get Allen’s minutes average up high enough, but they have to start trying soon.

Home/NBA