Prince Fielder doesn’t ‘give a bleep’ about playing Detroit

Rangers first baseman Prince Fielder must be pretty excited about finally getting the chance to suit up and mash the ball against his old team the Detroit Tigers right?

Well, maybe not.

According to Prince himself, there is no excitement at all going into Texas’ four-game series against the Zubaz-bedecked Tigers and all those sick starting pitchers of theirs. All he cares about is getting back from the herniated disc problem that has been bothering him.

“I don’t give a [expletive] about the Detroit series,” Fielder told reporters on Tuesday per the Detroit Free Press. “I just want to get back.”

So I guess that means there are no hard feelings between Prince and the Tigers after Detroit dealt him to Texas in the offseason in exchange for Ian Kinsler? Or maybe Prince is just pretending to be tough on the outside so no one knows that inside he is burning for revenge like Khan.

Outside, Prince is all like “who gives a crap,” but inside he’s probably like Ricardo Montalban all tearing his shirt open and screaming lines from Moby Dick.

But it doesn’t matter if he can’t get back from the neck problem. He has zero shot at raking against the likes of Verlander, Scherzer and Porcello with random hunks of cartilage sticking out of his spine all over the place.

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