Bud Selig on endless Home Run Derby: ‘TV wants 3-hour program’

Jul 14, 2014; Minneapolis, MN, USA; American League outfielder Yoenis Cespedes (52) of the Oakland Athletics hoists the championship trophy after winning the 2014 Home Run Derby the day before the MLB All Star Game at Target Field. Mandatory Credit: Jesse Johnson-USA TODAY Sports
Jul 14, 2014; Minneapolis, MN, USA; American League outfielder Yoenis Cespedes (52) of the Oakland Athletics hoists the championship trophy after winning the 2014 Home Run Derby the day before the MLB All Star Game at Target Field. Mandatory Credit: Jesse Johnson-USA TODAY Sports /
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Hey doddering old baseball commissioner Bud Selig, why is that the showcase event of your All-Star week, the Home Run Derby, goes on longer than the average real baseball game, causing most fans to fall asleep before they ever get to the end?

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Why must the Home Run Derby, a potentially very fun event, be dragged out to such mind-numbingly interminable lengths? Why not change the format and shorten it and give it a little more punch and excitement and keep fans engaged?

Why turn an amusing exhibition of home run prowess into something so utterly tedious even the most loyal of fans can no longer stomach it after awhile and must change the channel?

Why give Chris Berman the opportunity to go on doing his idiotic schtick for three gosh dang hours when the whole thing could easily be tightened up with a few simple format tweaks, forcing us to endure just two hours of that pompous blowhard Berman instead of the soul-crushing three-plus?

Why, Bud Selig? Why must the Home Run Derby try our patience to the point where we wish we never had to look at another baseball soaring into the sky ever ever again? Why do you and the baseball powers-that-be have to make the Home Run Derby suck?

Oh.

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