Fansided

Hardwood Paroxysm: Basketball’s Multi-Sport Athletes

By HP Basketball Network

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Jan 22, 2014; New York, NY, USA; New York Knicks center Andrea Bargnani (77) drives to the basket and is fouled by Philadelphia 76ers power forward Thaddeus Young (21) during the second half at Madison Square Garden. Philadelphia 76ers defeat the New York Knicks 110-105. Mandatory Credit: Jim O
Jan 22, 2014; New York, NY, USA; New York Knicks center Andrea Bargnani (77) drives to the basket and is fouled by Philadelphia 76ers power forward Thaddeus Young (21) during the second half at Madison Square Garden. Philadelphia 76ers defeat the New York Knicks 110-105. Mandatory Credit: Jim O /

Andrea Bargnani Would Make a Great Three-Card Monte Dealer

By Kevin McElroy (@knickerbacker)

Three-card Monte is, at its heart, a con. That’s the first thing to know about it. And like any good con it starts off by looking too good to be true.

Three-card Monte is a magic trick, illusion masked as sport and money pit masked as investment. It draws in those who are too confident that they can succeed where they’ve watched others fail, who ignore evidence for the sake of hubris and covet false fluidity over substance.

Three-card Monte is barely a sport; I’m skirting the criteria behind this list every bit as much as a player who has been hard-pressed to convert a third of his three pointers skirts the criteria that define the phrase “stretch four.”

Three-card Monte was my first choice for this column, despite the undeniable presence of better options.

And when the dust settles and the cards are holstered and the cash is counted, when the grifters shout “Cops!” and the table is folded and you’re left clinging to an empty phrase and an empty wallet and the vague impression that NEXT TIME you can actually make this work, Three-card Monte will have fooled you and ruined you and won you over all at once.

“Who can find the lady?! Where’d she go?! Surely YOU, sir, can find her!” bellows Andrea Bargnani. And you put a dollar on the table. And you belly up.

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