WWE RAW Report (December 15, 2014): Brock Lesnar returns to save the show

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I’m going to make this report very brief because, quite frankly, I don’t like repeating myself over and over again in these reports with the same old complaints. It’s abundantly clear that the WWE will continue to tread water and kill time as long as Monday Night Football is on the air. There are rumors that the locker room isn’t happy and the product reflects it.

We’re at the point in which I likely wouldn’t watch RAW if I didn’t write about it every week. To be frank, it’s frustrating to even write that sentence because this roster has so much talent on it. Every week, these guys and gals could make NXT look like child’s play, but instead looked handcuffed by mediocre-at-best booking and are now hearing “N-X-T” chants while stale matches bore the live audience.

I’m still hopeful that, with football season winding down and the Road to Wrestlemania soon underway, things can turn a corner. Something needs to change.

But hey, the entire three hours wasn’t a waste because we got BROCK LESNAR:

I don’t even care that his return was booked as a heel playing babyface to save his friend (also a heel) from being bullied by the babyface guest GM, Chris Jericho. Brock was on TV, looked like a million bucks, and destroyed someone. I need this on my wrestling show right now.

Five Takeaways from the Night

1) Seth Rollins and John Cena deserve some kind of “workrate that saves bad programming” award.

After having a tables match the night before that killed all kinds time, Rollins and Cena were back out on RAW for a cage match that took up most of the final hour of RAW. This affair was a lot better than the overbooked mess at TLC, but, if I’m being perfectly honest and objective, these two saved both TLC and RAW from being complete disasters.

Take their matches away from both shows and TLC is left with a great opening ladder match, decent divas match, and a TV exploding in Dean Ambrose’s face, while RAW is just three hours of uninspired programming with Brock F5’ing Jericho.

My worry right now is that with the entire product spiraling downward, fans really aren’t appreciating what they’re getting here, myself included. I didn’t even realize I got lost in this match and enjoyed it until I started thinking about this post and that’s a damn shame.

2) The opening promo segment was 23 minutes long.

Almost half of the first hour was used for pointless mic time. This happens nearly every week and it’s getting old. There is absolutely no reason that it should take so long to get to wrestling on a wrestling show. Even Vince McMahon’s “this is sports entertainment” argument doesn’t work here. Get to the actual “sport”.

More from WWE

You know what happens when WWE superstars fart around on the mic for this long? Fans get bored. Things that should be minor annoyances begin to piss us off and those annoyances continue to repeat themselves over and over. It sticks out like a sore thumb.

Perhaps I could somehwhat tolerate Jericho’s terrible dad joke humor and even Cena trying to verbally neuter Seth Rollins if it didn’t loop like this. But no, Jericho becomes the man of 1,000 Fandango puns and Cena repeatedly reminds Seth that he has no balls.

Here’s a novel thought: stop giving the worst parts of your programming the most time on the show.

3) Dear favorite current NXT talent, stay there forever.

This episode alone featured all kinds of wonderful examples of how NXT stars get ruined on the main roster:

  • Big E and Xaiver Woods are stuck in a gimmick that grows more uncomfortably stereotypical and borderline racist every week. Big E falling to the wayside is the most criminal–hell, his “I need five” gimmick never even made an appearance with him on the main roster. And to think I was excited to see something new for these guys. Ugh.
  • After headlining a PPV, Dean Ambrose and Bray Wyatt weren’t even on the show.
  • Adam Rose lost to Kane because. Not that’s not a typo, that all just kind of happened. By the way, Rose is still having to tease a rivalry with a guy in a bunny suit and a thing that was once funny is getting beaten into the ground.
  • Fandango came out to get heat for stealing Jericho’s worked award and to get punched in the face by one of the lone exceptions to the NXT rule, Roman Reigns.
  • Tyson Kidd, a career revived by NXT, now looks to be booked in a made-for-Total Divas program love triangle with the Bella Twins and Nattie (or maybe love quadrangle…love rhombus?).
  • The Ascension get their long-awaited main roster tease by WWE creative taking their already generic gimmick and turning them into the Road Warriors. How in the hell do make their gimmick worse?!

I just don’t understand how rising to the main roster ends up being the death of so many NXT superstars. I totally get some folks not panning out, but the percentage is far too high to blame them, in my opinion. At some point, creative is going to look in the mirror and realize this, but I fear it’ll be too late.

4) After having a night in which the heels got to be heels, the WWE corrected course and let the babyfaces be heels.

The peak of this insanity: the Usos cheated to beat the Miz, taking advantage of a referee distraction to hit Miz with a Slammy. Even better, the crowd booed this action and then immediately cheered for the pinfall.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

5) I want to buy this person a beer.

You are the voice of the voiceless.