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Now 50 Cent is getting a baseball card for his horrendous first pitch

By Stanford Crissey

May 27, 2014; New York, NY, USA; New York Mets starting pitcher Jonathon Niese (49) looks on as recording artist 50 Cent throws out the ceremonial first pitch prior to the game against the Pittsburgh Pirates at Citi Field. Credit: William Perlman/THE STAR-LEDGER via USA TODAY Sports
May 27, 2014; New York, NY, USA; New York Mets starting pitcher Jonathon Niese (49) looks on as recording artist 50 Cent throws out the ceremonial first pitch prior to the game against the Pittsburgh Pirates at Citi Field. Credit: William Perlman/THE STAR-LEDGER via USA TODAY Sports /
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May 27, 2014; New York, NY, USA; New York Mets starting pitcher Jonathon Niese (49) looks on as recording artist 50 Cent throws out the ceremonial first pitch prior to the game against the Pittsburgh Pirates at Citi Field. Credit: William Perlman/THE STAR-LEDGER via USA TODAY Sports
May 27, 2014; New York, NY, USA; New York Mets starting pitcher Jonathon Niese (49) looks on as recording artist 50 Cent throws out the ceremonial first pitch prior to the game against the Pittsburgh Pirates at Citi Field. Credit: William Perlman/THE STAR-LEDGER via USA TODAY Sports /

Topps rewards the rapper for pitching incompetence with his very own baseball card

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Last May, rapper 50 Cent threw out the first pitch at Citi Field before a Mets game, and if you haven’t seen it, you missed out, because it was legendarily bad.

And just in case you don’t believe how funny it is, here’s the video (note that FUNNY is in all caps on the title, for emphasis):

I mean, the pitch is incomprehensibly bad. 50 Cent might have the worst aim in the history of people throwing things. It defies the boundaries of normal human incompetence, because you would think maybe he’s a bad pitcher, but he should at least be able to get the ball in the plate’s general direction. Nope, not the case here.

The pitch briefly became an internet sensation, and earlier this year, MLB Network rewarded 50 Cent for his embarrassing efforts by giving him an award. And the rewards just keep coming for him, as now he will be featured on his very own baseball card.

(Side note: does anyone else find it odd that the Mets’ Twitter name is #DavidWright? At first I thought it was Wright himself, and that he was trying to make himself into the physical embodiment of a hashtag. But no, it’s the Mets’ account. Why single him out? There are other players on the Mets people have heard of, right? …Actually, you know what, don’t answer that.)

In throwing that hilarious first pitch, 50 Cent inadvertently provided kids who dream of being on their own baseball card a shortcut: if you can’t be really good, just be really bad! The precedent is set! Now I demand that Topps put 9-year-old me, who played the outfield by playing with the sand with his back to everyone else, all thoughts of the game forgotten, on his own baseball card. Equal rights for incompetence!

It just goes to show you, kids: being terrible can pay off. You just have to be really terrible.

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