We dropped our weekly RTOE earlier this morning, but when the news broke of the Mario Chalmers for Beno Udrih trade, we had no choice but to drop everything and put together an emergency RTOE. Let’s get into it.
Please use an emoji to describe your first thought upon hearing this trade:
Jack Maloney (@jackhaveitall)
Jacob Rosen (@WFNYJacob)
Taylor Smith (@TaylorBojangles)
Ryne Prinz (@ryneprinz)
Was the deal from the Heat’s perspective more about saving money or adding another piece to their horde of left-handed players?
Jack: 100 percent about adding another left-handed player. 2.5 million dollars? Please, that’s nothing for a guy like Micky Arison. The dude’s net worth is 7.1 billion dollars. Losing 2.5 million for him is like 35 cents falling out of a regular person’s pocket. Soon Dwyane Wade will be shipped out of town for Brandon Jennings, and then everyone will see the truth. #StayWoke.
Jacob: Let’s bring some math to the situation. According to Basketball-Reference, 36 left-handed shooters have played in the NBA this season. Of those, five played for Miami and four for Memphis. Utah also has four. Brooklyn has three. No other team has more than two. So with Beno Udrih in tow, Miami now has one-sixth of the league’s lefties. How can you deny their intent in this deal?
Taylor: I’m hoping at some point they’ll trade for Tristan Thompson and force him to play as a lefty again. The march to 12 lefties continues.
Ryne: Money schmoney. Beno has one of the smoothest lefty jumpers, which is perfect for this southpaw arsenal in South Beach.
Which Grizzlies player assumes the role of yelling at Mario Chalmers at all times?
Jack: Matt Barnes. He just seems like a guy who just likes to yell in general, so he should have no problem directing any and all of his future yells in Chalmers’ direction.
Jacob: Tony Allen. If we’re being honest, Memphis certainly could have used some “First-Team All-Defense” against Chalmers in the 2008 NCAA title game, amiright?
Taylor: The Grizzlies actually seem like a bunch of chill dudes. But I’ll say Z-Bo. I can totally envision Randolph giving Mario Chalmers a noogie.
Ryne: I’m backing up Taylor on this one. Z-Bo is a bully in the post and a bully in the truest form of the word.