The Weekside: Ranking the Christmas NBA games for your wish list

The NFL has Thanksgiving, the NCAA has New Year’s, and the NBA has Christmas. This is how Big Sports Cartel decided we would spend the most important fall and winter days of the calendar, and that means that tomorrow is a day of presents, candy canes, and roundball.

Some of us will watch all five NBA games, but most people have families that love them and would prefer that they didn’t spend 12-plus hours in front of a TV set on the holiest of consumer holidays.

If this is your reality, here is list ranking each of today’s games from can-miss to must-watch.

5. Heat vs Pelicans

The Heat are 9-2 lifetime on Christmas day and have won six straight on the holiday. Anthony Davis will also play his first Christmas game ever. So there is plenty to like here.

One key drawback, however, is the fact that the Pelicans just aren’t good, with the league’s second-worst defense and a 9-19 record that puts them below everyone except the Sixers, Lakers, and Nets. Even with all the injuries, nobody expected a playoff team from last season that we thought would be on the rise under a new coach to start this badly.

4. Thunder vs Bulls

Kevin Durant and Russell Westbrook are the best one/two punch in the league — maybe since Shaq and Kobe. They make every Thunder game worth watching, as their second-half exploits in recent games have shown. Kobe’s Lakers actually hung around for a full half on Tuesday before the OKC dynamic duo stomped them out of existence after halftime and each made big plays late to beat the Clippers the night before. Overall, they have won nine of their last 10 with the only (narrow) defeat coming in Cleveland on a night LeBron went Superman.

The Bulls, however, are a bit of a mess right now, with a melancholy locker room, Joakim Noah hurt, and Derrick Rose playing like Tiny Tim. A throwback game from Rose or (more likely) an All-Star outing from Jimmy Butler could turn this into a dynamic matchup, but Oklahoma is at home and rolling while Chicago is not and not.

3. Lakers vs Clippers

KOBE. He’s playing well. Sure, we are still seeing the occasional airball, but this is still Christmas, and he is still Kobe — one last time. Bryant will retire at season’s end, and the NBA owning a day that once belonged to Cris Cringle is something that truly took over while Kobe was the most popular player on earth.

With 15 prior outings on Jesus’ birthday, he seemingly has been here on our TV sets for all of them, and the Old Mamba is easily the all-time leading scorer on this day with 383 points. (Dwyane Wade is second with just 258 points, although Durant’s 31.8 ppg average, in five outings, is second highest all time to Jerry West’s 32.2 ppg.) It will be weird to celebrate Christmas without Kobe next year. So for one last time, tune in — and hope he doesn’t shoot 5-for-29.

2. Spurs vs Rockets

The Spurs and Rockets couldn’t be having more-different seasons, with the team that bowed out of the playoffs earlier than expected last year tearing up everything this year while the team that went further than expected last season continues to stumble over its own feet. Houston has managed to claw its way back to .500, and the worst is likely in in the past. But they are still failing to string together impressive wins while working through the adjustment to a new coach, a failed Ty Lawson experiment, and a defense that while no longer laughable is still not striking fear into anyone.

The Spurs, meanwhile, are an absolute juggernaut that would be the talk of the league if the Warriors weren’t also having a historically good season that has muffled all other talk. The Spurs defense is the best in the league and their ball movement is as pretty as ever. In San Antonio, it’s hard to believe that Houston will keep up. So we might not get a great finish. But that doesn’t matter. Make your parents watch the Spurs be the Spurs.

1. Warriors vs Cavaliers

A rematch of the prior-year Finals has become a Christmas tradition like no other, and this is the most anticipated incarnation I can remember. There is nothing left to say about the Warriors that can be explained in English or any other known language while LeBron has certainly remained keenly aware of just how much the world thinks Golden State has already won the next ring. This could be outright epic if the Cavs get it clicking and threaten to do what no team seems capable of: winning in Golden State. Honestly, if you needed this paragraph to get you amped for LeBron vs. Curry, you probably don’t much care for basketball anyway. This is why we watch, so come out to the coast, we’ll get together, have a few laughs. Merry merry.

Around the Association

Atlanta Hawks

How much does the Tooth Fairy leave under your pillow when you make $1.8 million per year?

Boston Celtics

The Celtics are starting to put some things together and may be able to improve in-season if they can find a taker for David Lee. The former All-Star lost his role on the title-winning Warriors last season before ending up in Boston (although he did play a part in the Finals win over the Cavs), but at his age and with his skill set isn’t going to be part of the future in Beantown.

Brooklyn Nets

The lesson: Be careful what you wish for when you ask to be traded away from your successful, smart-market team.

Chicago Bulls

Everybody wants Derrick Rose to get back to being a high-level player, but at this point he really doesn’t even deserve to be a starter in this league anymore. Since injuring his knee in the 2012 playoffs —  which were so long ago that the Bulls were playing the 76ers (!!!) in that game — Derrick Rose has hit just 530-of-1359 (39.0%) shots, including 105-of-376 (27.9%) from 3-point range. There are few signs that things will improve any time soon.

Cleveland Cavaliers

Kaboom.

Dallas Mavericks

Yesterday, Dirk Nowitzki passed Shaquille O’Neal to become sixth all time in scoring. This is impressive enough, but the number of points that he has scored is simply mind boggling. To put the 28,609 points that Dirk — a single player — has scored, consider the current, unstoppable Golden State offense.

It would take the Warriors — an entire team with 15 players under contract — 248 games, or more than three seasons, while scoring at their current 115.5 point-per-game average to match what Dirk has done all by himself.

That is buckets.

Denver Nuggets

After 14 home games, the Nuggets are dead last in the league in attendance and the only NBA team that greets fewer than 14,000 fans per night, according to ESPN.

Golden State Warriors

Not fair.

Houston Rockets

Houston is improving, but let’s wait a few more weeks before breaking out the high fives, as Jason Patt of SB Nation explains: “The Rockets’ performance has been better of late, but they’ve also beaten some cream puffs. Five of the last 10 wins came against the Los Angeles Lakers (x2), Philadelphia 76ers, New Orleans Pelicans and Sacramento Kings, four of the worst teams in the league. The signature win came last Saturday at home against the Los Angeles Clippers, but the Clippers haven’t been lighting up the competition and also played the mighty San Antonio Spurs the night before.”

Indiana Pacers

Gregg Popovich taking time out of his coaching to comment on former Spur George Hill’s blond hair has been easily the best moment of the NBA season to date.

Los Angeles Lakers

Miami Heat

Justise League is in full swing in Miami, and the rookie’s play has been a big reason that LeBron’s old team is starting to look like it will be his biggest hurdle to appearing in his sixth straight finals. The team’s defense, though completely re-engineered since James was there, has gotten back into the top five and recent little-knowns Justise and Hassan Whiteside are a big reason why Erik Spoelstra’s new system is working.

Milwaukee Bucks

Jason Kidd has joined Steve Kerr on the coaching injured reserve list after having surgery on his hip. While Kidd really didn’t want to take time away, especially in an underperforming season for his team, his pain reportedly has gotten so bad that he has developed a tolerance to cortisone shots. Ouch.

Minnesota Timberwolves

Kevin Garnett is not on the same retirement tour that Kobe is going on, but his recent trip (and only trip) to Boston this year included a great, heartfelt show from the Celtics faithful. Though he didn’t play in the game, the crowd showed him much love late in the blowout win as “Gino Time” began. This was a favorite tradition of KG during his time in green, and the fans recognized both that and their appreciation of The Kid even though he’s now wearing a different jersey.

“That was like the cherry on top for me,” said Garnett of the Gino Time tribute, adding that many of the young Wolves players didn’t even really understand what was going on. “My teammates were looking at me like, ‘What is this?’ and I said I’ll explain later.”

New York Knicks

Slam magazine was one of the things that most solidified my love for the NBA. So it is with both great interest and great feeling-old-ness that I read Kristaps Porzingis discussing why appearing on the cover was a dream come true.

“I was following on Instagram Slam Magazine forever, since I started to play basketball,’’ said Porzingis via the NY Post. “One of my little dreams was to be on the cover. It was a pretty nice moment for me.’’

Following it on Instragram since he started to play? I don’t even think the internet existed when I started reading Slam.

Phoenix Suns

I don’t understand the world sometimes.

Portland Trail Blazers

Every once in a while, Gerald Henderson seems like an All-Star. (via SLAM)

Sacramento Kings

The good (THIS PASS, triple doubles), the bad (his 17.6% midrange shooting from 10 to 16 feet), and ugly (kicking a camera, gay slurs) of Rajon Rondo has never quite been on display like it has been this season.

San Antonio Spurs

The Spurs have — by far — the best defense in the league and run plays so beautiful that no team, save the Warriors, can come close to putting on such a show. The Western Conference finals are going to be incredible.

Toronto Raptors

Jonas Valanciunas will soon be back to a team that, while still tough to explain, has won six of its last nine, including victories over the Spurs and Heat (in Miami).

Utah Jazz

You got Burked.

Words With Friends

This week’s five must-read articles about the NBA. Excerpts here — click through to read the full piece.

1. The evolution of Steph Curry: The man the NBA can’t take its eyes off of
by Chris Ballard, Sports Illustrated

We live in an age populated by some of the greatest talents in NBA history—soaring giants like LeBron James, Kevin Durant and Anthony Davis—and yet the player many would pay the most to see live is a thin, 6’3″ guard with regular-guy hops. We watch Curry for the no-look lobs, and the sideshow dribbling but, most of all, for the Oh Come On moments: those crazy step-backs and rocket launcher threes and reverse layups that go in with stunning regularity. Last Wednesday against the Suns, Steph was fouled and absent-mindedly flipped up a running 27-footer. Naturally, it banked in. He crossed-up Jon Leuer twice, hopped back and arced in a ridiculous fadeaway three. But my favorite OCO moment came hours earlier, near the end of his pregame shooting routine. Heels planted on the blue halfcourt circle, Curry shot a sequence of 40-footers, his form no different than on a midrange J: shoulder firing, wrist snapping, body aligned. Around him, his peers pretended not to watch but snuck glances. Media and assistant coaches stopped and gazed. In the stands, the early arrivers brandished iPhones, hoping to capture a piece of Steph for themselves.

2. Stephon Marbury honored with museum in Beijing
by ESPN

Stephon Marbury is so big in China that he’s been immortalized with his own statue and postage stamp. Now a museum dedicated to the former NBA star is set to open next week … Marbury has led the Beijing Ducks to three of the past four Chinese Basketball Association championships, including last season, when he was named finals MVP for the first time. He averaged 29.7 points, 4.8 rebounds, 5.7 assists and 2 steals over the best-of-seven series, which Beijing won 4-2.

3. Best way to watch Wolves’ Karl-Anthony Towns? With his amazing family
by Fred Katz, Fox Sports

“I don’t think he realized he was in the NBA until Wednesday night when he walked out into the Mecca, because you dream about playing in the Garden,” Karl Sr. marveled. “I said, ‘Karl, how do you feel?’ He said, ‘You know what? I’m in the league, huh?’ I said, ‘Yeah, Karl. You’re in the league.’” For mom and dad though, who often travel back and forth from Minnesota, it’s just another day on edge. That’s part of the package in being an NBA parent these days. When you fuse money with a 20-year-old’s NBA lifestyle, beau ideals are key. And for the Townses, it’s a family affair. “That’s his role model,” Karl Sr. said of his daughter, Lachelle, Karl-Anthony’s sister who is 15 years older than him. “They do everything together.”

4. Measuring Skill vs. Luck in NBA Defense
by Johannes Becker, Nylon Calculus

The Houston Rockets defense is crumbling. After being the 8th best defense of last year, with a defensive rating of 103.4, they are down to a 24th this year with a defensive rating of 106.81. Twitter is full of mentions of Houston’s bad defense. But here is the thing where Charles Barkley might have been right last year: The Rockets’ defense was probably more lucky than good during the last season2. Looking deeper into the numbers … things become more and more clear.

5. Miami Heat Defense: The Up and Up
by Couper Moorhead, Heat.com

If you’ve been paying close attention to the Miami HEAT this season, you know that the blitz is over. What was once one of the most unique defensive systems in the league, the aggressive, chaotic, help-heavy Omega Swarm that helped take Miami to four straight NBA Finals, is no more. It’s been tweaked into a different, more conservative form – one that more closely resembles the schemes the team used to go up against in the playoffs every year. The reasons for the altered philosophy are complicated, but they stem from the league’s shift towards spacing and shooting – a sea change Miami is partially responsible for.