33 NFL Players To Help You Survive The Zombie Apocalypse

27. Caleb Sturgis

You may not know much about Caleb Sturgis. He’s a Florida kid who played his high school ball in St. Augustine and collegiately at the University of Florida. He was a First-Team All-State placekicker as a senior, despite making just 13 of 25 field goal attempts. His father’s name is Smiley. None of this information can help you survive a zombie apocalypse.

The most relevant Sturgis news emerged this summer, when Sturgis was knocked out of a preseason game against the Pittsburgh Steelers during warmups — in and of itself, not exactly a big news story. Later it emerged that Sturgis suffered a concussion in warmups, which is peculiar for a kicker, since they don’t participate in any contact drills. Finally the truth came out: Sturgis was concussed by Eagles’ punter Donnie Jones. Not because of a beef over money or a love triangle.

Sturgis was concussed after being hit on the head by a punt. This may sound ridiculous, but in a zombie apocalypse Sturgis could be the genetic answer to all our prayers. If his head is fragile enough to be concussed by a punt, it’s possible there’s some unique quality to his cranial solidity, something that may cause the undead to pass him by without bothering him. A head that special just might be the beginning of engineering zombie-proof humans. That could render zombies a scourge of the past, like polio or smallpox. All thanks to one unseen punt.

Next: Ryan Fitzpatrick