Colorado tries to troll Jim Harbaugh

What to do when you’re an early 20-point underdog going on the road? Try trolling a head coach for his depth-chart policies.

The University of Colorado Buffaloes play the University of Michigan Wolverines this weekend. UM’s head coach, Jim Harbaugh, isn’t a big fan of releasing his depth chart. He wouldn’t even let the media know who his starting quarterback was ahead of a week-one warmup against Hawaii.

So, Colorado Sports Information Director Dave Plati made the decision that the Buffs would not be releasing a depth chart of their own this week. Here’s the fake one that CU released this morning.

The fake depth chart is fairly funny. A highlight is South Park and Colorado’s own Eric Cartman, listed at 3-foot-5 and 190 pounds starting at left tackle. One would have to hope, though, that the currently nine-year-old cartoon character would grow a few inches before his junior year of college. It’s hard to imagine Cartman beating out 400-pound Fat Albert. Big props to Albert for being willing to be football’s first openly 400-pound player. That, folks, is the definition of courage.

On defense, the Buffs will go with a bit of a prevent defense, but it’s unclear what exactly they will be preventing with their four linemen and seven defensive backs. Wanda Gershwitz will make history as the first female position player in Division I football.

It’s all fun and games for Colorado for now. They opened up as 20-point ‘dogs going on the road into the Big House in Ann Arbor. The Buffs haven’t played in a bowl game since 2007, and have not had a winning record since 2005.

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Things are off to a good start so far this year, as Colorado has beaten Colorado State and Idaho State by a combined score of 100-14 to start the year. Something tells me, though, that it will be Jim Harbaugh who has the last laugh on Saturday, regardless of who starts at quarterback for either team.