Dear Giannis Antetokounmpo and Jabari Parker,
I’d like to tell you a cautionary tale of two best friends who became work friends but no longer speak to each other.
These two kids were as different as two kids could be. One was a silent assassin who was humble and respectful. The other was a miserable spark plug who only seemed to care about himself. They weren’t put together by choice, but they quickly learned to appreciate each other. They butted heads often — especially early in their relationship — but it was out of love and respect.
Individually, they were great. But together, they seemed unstoppable. Had it not been for a series of unfortunate events, they could have gone down as one of the greatest duos of all-time. They still had a chance to achieve a certain level of success that many could only dream of.
Instead, those two kids went their separate ways. The one labeled as “immature” and “selfish” stayed to try and finish what he started. The other one decided that he wanted to travel with a different group of friends.
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I’m telling you this tale because I don’t want to you see go down this path. I want to see you stay together and achieve the things that the two former friends couldn’t. I also want you two to remain on speaking terms because I like to imagine that you have fun conversations about food and dance clubs.
I know things are tough right now, but this is only your second real season together. These things take time. And these things take more time when your head coach’s biggest claim to coaching fame is telling someone to purposely run into him so his drink would spill. I guess he won a playoff series, but let’s not let facts get in the way of a mediocre joke.
There is something special about the both of you. There are plenty of homegrown duos in the NBA, but they all feel the same. A great point guard paired with a great shooting guard. They shoot the lights out, they make fancy passes, they make tough plays and sometimes they dunk.
Did you guys ever play NBA Jam? That game is so great. You don’t have to utilize any useless players because the game is 2-on-2. Your offense is “turbo and dunk and sometimes shoot a 3-pointer” and your defense is “shove the guy to the ground and steal the ball.” I wasted so many of my parents’ quarters dunking with Patrick Ewing and shoving guys with Charles Oakley.
You two would be my NBA Jam 2017 team. Everyone else would pick Stephen Curry and Kevin Durant and I would have so much fun shoving them to the ground. I just hope no one picks Draymond Green because he probably has kicks instead of shoves and that wouldn’t be very fair.
It’s fun to watch you two play basketball together and I want to watch you two play basketball together for the next 15 years. You could probably win eight of the next 15 titles. Sure, that sounds absurd, but then I watched this a million times and decided that nothing involving you guys can be labeled as absurd.
What I’m trying to say is: Please stay together. Don’t head for greener pastures in six years if you two have yet to win a title together. Just remember that you’re going to win eight of the next nine.
Splitting would be the easy thing to do, and it would probably result in one of you winning a title with someone else. That would suck. Please don’t break the hearts of Milwaukee fans like that. They don’t have a lot going on. The Brewers will never be good, and the Bucks are their only other sports team. Your Bucks. The team that drafted and raised you. Don’t let the Bucks’ biggest claim to fame remain that line in that Jadakiss song.
I want to see you two have the moment that John Stockton and Karl Malone, Gary Payton and Shawn Kemp, Shaquille O’Neal and Penny Hardaway and Kevin Garnett and Stephon Marburry never had. I want to see you two twice wrap your arms around each other and never let go as confetti drops and Adam Silver announces the Milwaukee Bucks as NBA Champions. It would be my favorite moment in NBA history. And I’m not even a Bucks fan. I’m just a fan of you two as teammates.