The 10 greatest mustaches in NBA history

INGLEWOOD, CA - CIRCA 1987: Artis Gilmore
INGLEWOOD, CA - CIRCA 1987: Artis Gilmore /
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Get to know the greatest mustaches in NBA history.

More than any other major American sport, basketball offers its viewers an intimate experience. It’s the only sport where the players don’t wear hats or helmets that obscure the audience’s vision, it’s the sport with the smallest playing area, and it’s the sport where a star player can be in the action for the largest part of each game — together, these factors allow NBA fans to get very familiar with their heroes. And as a result, an NBA player’s appearance matters — including what he grows on his face.

While there are important caveats — specific high-profile quarterbacks and pitchers who’ve made lasting contributions to the legacy of the lip sweater, for example — no other sport has had a richer history with the whiskers than basketball.

And because narrowing the list of all-time greatest NBA mustaches to ten would be torture for a face-fur-phile like me, I’ll use dog-show format instead — one winner apiece from each of nine themed groups, plus a best-in-bristles overall prize.

INGLEWOOD, CA – CIRCA 1987: Artis Gilmore
INGLEWOOD, CA – CIRCA 1987: Artis Gilmore /

STYLE

The 1950s NBA was a pretty straight-laced scene. Most of the league’s stars looked like G.I. Joes, just home from military service. There wasn’t a lot of style to go around, and definitely not much facial hair. With few exceptions, the clean-shaven status quo continued to stretch into the first few years of the next decade; but in 1967, the birth of the upstart ABA marked a turning point in basketball style. And in less than ten years, the ABA had revolutionized the look of the sport, entirely. The league introduced the slam dunk contest, the 3-point line, and the tri-colored basketball; but most importantly, it was responsible for so many great mustaches.

Basketball’s new look was epitomized by the ABA’s best player, Julius Erving, who — with his afro and mustache — was the embodiment of cool. But it wasn’t just Dr. J; all of the league’s best players — Zelmo Beaty, Louie Dampier, George Gervin, George McGinnis — were mustachioed. Just crack open the ABA trading card price guide and you’ll find Brian Taylor’s noatee, Ollie Taylor’s isosceles mouth triangle, and Roland Taylor’s Cowardly Lion — all on a single page.

The ABA brought an infusion of self expression to the stodgy NBA; after the merger, players like Connie Hawkins continued to experiment with new configurations of facial flair. And the influence of the ABA reached NBA-lifers too, as demonstrated by the epic caterpillars of Walt Frazier and Pete Maravich.

But, no ABA player brought more style to the NBA than Artis Gilmore. His “elevator going up arrow” mustache-and-goatee combo was totally unique and entirely befitting a professional dunker.