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NBA Study Session: Young players and who they can study to improve

By Jeremy Lambert

MINNEAPOLIS, MN - JULY 8: Karl Anthony-Towns #32 of the Minnesota Timberwolves speaks to the fans during a scrimmage on July 8, 2015 at Target Center in Minneapolis, Minnesota. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and or using this Photograph, user is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License Agreement. Mandatory Copyright Notice: Copyright 2015 NBAE (Photo by David Sherman/NBAE via Getty Images)
MINNEAPOLIS, MN - JULY 8: Karl Anthony-Towns #32 of the Minnesota Timberwolves speaks to the fans during a scrimmage on July 8, 2015 at Target Center in Minneapolis, Minnesota. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and or using this Photograph, user is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License Agreement. Mandatory Copyright Notice: Copyright 2015 NBAE (Photo by David Sherman/NBAE via Getty Images) /
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Kristaps Porzingis knows that to be the greatest NBA player of all-time, he has to expand his game. That’s why he’s studying Conor McGregor in order to improve his trash talking.

I’m so excited for Kristaps to drop a “Who the F- is that guy?” when asked about Phil Jackson next season.

More young players should aspire to be like KP. And if they need suggestions on who they should study and how that will help them, well, that’s what I’m here for.

Read More: Five lineups we can’t wait to see next NBA season

Karl-Anthony Towns — Study Ben Wallace. Watch how he got his fro as beautiful as he did. Try to get your fro that beautiful. A good afro is the key to being a better defender. It’s intimidating and gives the impression that you’re taller than you actually are. Grow a beautiful afro. Win Defensive Player of the Year. That’s how this works.

Nikola Jokic — Study The Joker. It’d be really cool if you terrorized players on and off the court and lived up the ‘Joker’ nickname. Maybe kidnap Russell Westbrook before a game. Wait, no. Don’t kidnap Westbrook. That could end badly. Maybe kidnap Steph Curry. That’s more realistic. Kidnap Curry, remake Celtic Pride, profit.

The Philadelphia 76ers — Study The Fast & The Furious franchise. In The Fast & The Furious, Vin Diesel leads a group of street racers in robbing shipping trucks on the highway. In Fate Of The Furious, Vin Diesel leads a group of street racers, DSS agents, assassins, mechanics, and hackers in stealing weapons of mass destruction. That’s a process you should emulate.

Lonzo Ball — Study Marshawn Lynch. You’re  going to be asked a lot of questions this season. Some will be fair, some won’t. You’ll be forced to answer questions that most rookies won’t have to deal with. That’s the aura your father has created around you. Just answer every question with, “ask my dad.” He’ll do enough talking for the both of you.

Devin Booker — Study Klay Thompson. If possible, get a sample of his DNA. The world needs to know if you two are long lost twins.

Andrew Wiggins — Study Jimmy Butler. Just ask you if can you shadow him this entire season. I once said that you were the next Jimmy Butler. It’d be pretty cool if you proved me right. I like being right and I think you would like being as good as Jimmy Butler. You two are teammates now. He’s a nice guy.

Giannis Antetokounmpo and Jabari Parker — Study Woody and Buzz Lightyear. Realize that, even though one of you is from a different planet, you can co-exist, be the best of friends, and defeat the evil Sid.

Stanley Johnson — Study Rip Hamilton. Wear a face mask. The Pistons stopped being cool when Rip took his face mask to Chicago. Bring the face mask back to Detroit. Make the Pistons cool again.

Justise Winslow — Study Carl Winslow. Because nobody brought the justice like Carl Winslow.

Jaylen Brown and Jayson Tatum — Study Terry Rozier. Figure out why Danny Ainge refuses to include him in trades and do that. Assuming you want to stay in Boston. If you want out of Boston, do the opposite of Terry Rozier. Either way, you’ll learn something.

Buddy Hield — Study Ric Flair. If you’re going to keep hitting players in the balls, at least pick up some tricks from the dirtiest player in the game.

D’Angelo Russell — Study Nelson Mandela. This will help you become a better leader. And I specifically chose someone older in hopes that you won’t use the internet to complete the assignment. Go to the library, read some books, and get away from technology.

Myles Turner — Study Allen Iverson. I just want to see a 6-foot-11 Allen Iverson. I think that’d be neat.

Next: Another Michael Jordan record falls

Remember, the only way to improve is to watch how others did it. The more time you spend on YouTube, the better you’ll be at basketball. Except you, D’Angelo. No YouTube. Read some books.

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