A brief history of Minnesota Sports heartbreak, for perspective

Good things never happen to Minnesota Vikings fans, and outsiders need to know their pain to appreciate how special this season is.

Minnesota sports is not a fun thing. It’s not something you choose, it’s a lifestyle you’re born into and have to wear like a cross for the rest of your life. People live, die, and are buried in Minnesota — meaning they’re trapped in a graveyard of sports dreams.

To call Minnesota a sports boneyard is to put it lightly. Whenever something can go wrong usually does, and we were so close to seeing that happen last Sunday before the Minneapolis Miracle. For the uninitiated, it can’t be expressed enough how things like Stefon Diggs catch are not supposed to happen. There isn’t a safer bet than Minnesota sports being on the wrong side of some historic play, and that’s why there was so much pure cathartic elation when something finally went right.

Of course, the universe overcorrected for this singular moment of happiness by having the Vikings crushed in the NFC Championship Game the following week, 38-7.

The entire history of Minnesota sports is steeped in half-realized dreams. For years the Twins found a way to win with small ball but never spent even half a dime more than they payroll allowed even if that could have meant adding a missing piece. The biggest win in Timberwolves franchise history was trading for another team’s superstar, and that was mostly because no one believed anyone actually wanted to play there.

For the uninitiated, here’s a little trip down one of the most depressing roads in sports history for proper context to how Vikings fans are feeling after the NFC Championship Game.

Honorable Mention

These ones don’t totally involve the Vikings, but it gives you a better idea of how cursed Minnesota Sports have been over the years. The Vikings are the crown jewel of depression, but there’s plenty to go around no matter which sport you like.

• Vikings make it to four Super Bowls, lose every single time. They haven’t been back in over 40-years.
• In just its third season of existence, the Wild incredibly make it to Western Conference Finals only to get swept by the Anaheim Ducks.
• Between 2002 and 2010 the Twins make the playoffs six times, manage to win only one series. Four of those losses came at the hands of the Yankees.
• In 2009, the Timberwolves — despite having two picks in the Top 10 — pass on Steph Curry twice.
• After convincing fans a Stanley Cup caliber team has been built, the Wild lose in three consecutive years to the Blackhawks.
• Following a 100-loss season, the Twins make it to the playoffs for the first time in six years only to lose to the Yankees. The knife twist: Minnesota scored and surrendered a three-run lead in the first inning.
• That time the hockey team left the state (one that has 10,000 frozen lakes every year) to play in Texas (where ice is only sold in stores).

Vikings blow 1998 NFC Championship Game

The Scenario: Minnesota is leading Atlanta late in the fourth quarter of the NFC title game. They have one of the best offenses in the history of football, which includes a revived Randall Cunningham throwing to both Randy Moss and Cris Carter.

The Heartbreak: Gary Andersen, who hadn’t missed a field goal the entire game, misses. This pumps new life into the Falcons, who march down and score to tie the game and force overtime, where they would eventually win.

Two years later, Vikings lose 41-0 in NFC Championship Game

The Scenario: Minnesota’s championship window after the 1998 season was closing, and they were once again a game away from the Super Bowl. Daunte Culpepper looked like he might be the franchise quarterback the team has never had, and Cris Carter was in what appeared to be his farewell season.

The Heartbreak: Instead of blowing it at the last minute, the Vikings simply failed to show up at all and got blown out 41-0 in one of the most embarrassing losses in playoff history. It was so bad that Vikings fans had to rationalize the loss by convincing themselves the Giants were stealing play calls.

Threads had been loosening all season long, and things just unraveled in the NFC Championship. This was the season of Randy Moss deciding he wanted to play and when he wanted to take a game off, Cris Carter and Daunte Culpepper fighting on the sideline, and it was the last season Dennis Green spent in Minnesota.

Vikings blow 2009 NFC Championship Game

The Scenario: With a resurgent Brett Favre, the Vikings put together a vaunted defense and storm to the NFC title game in New Orleans. With the game tight and time running out, all Favre needs to do is get downfield and let Blair Walsh attempt a field goal that would put the game away.

The Heartbreak: Favre, playing hero ball, throws an interception. New Orleans doesn’t have to move the ball far to set up a game-winning field goal and head to the Super Bowl.

Kids who weren’t old enough to experience the heartbreak of the ’98  Championship Game were given their own tragic Vikings moment to mourn. Not only are the Vikings cursed but they find a way to reach across generations to spread the heartbreak out.

Blair Walsh misses the easiest kick of his life

The Scenario: In a game with sub-zero temperatures, the Vikings are in a position to kick a chip shot field and advance out of the Wild Card round. It was shorter than an extra point attempt.

The Heartbreak: Blair Walsh could not have missed the kick harder to the left if he had tried to.

I remember being in a bar full of people when this happened. Everyone said that Blair Walsh was going to make the field goal because there was no possible way he could miss. Those people were not from Minnesota and had no idea what we were in store for. What hurt about this one is that the Vikings absolutely played better than the Seahawks, and still found a way to lose even when the win was basically gifted to them.

Josh McCown hail mary keeps Vikings out of 2003 Playoffs

The Scenario: Thanks to a handful of tiebreaker scenarios, the Vikings can make the playoffs with a Week 17 win in Arizona. All they need to do is stop a hail mary at the end of the game.

The Heartbreak: Josh McCown launches the hail mary, Nate Poole catches the ball but because he was shoved out of bounds in the endzone — with possession — the official rule that it’s a catch and the touchdown counts.

It’s also one of the greatest calls in sports radio history. Paul Allen’s exasperated expression is the perfect personification of #MinnesotaSports ever recorded.

That right there — the sound of a man’s heart shattering into pieces live on-air — is the sound of Minnesota Sports.

Paul Allen’s shrieks are truly the sound of silence. Welcome to Minnesota, the place where your sports dreams go to die unless you’re the team on the other sideline.