Super Bowl 52 drinking game for Patriots vs. Eagles, Part Deux

In case you really don’t like the New England Patriots or Philadelphia Eagles, here is a second drinking game you can have fun with during Super Bowl 52.

Let’s be real. Super Bowl 52 features two very regional teams with obnoxious fan bases. Do you really want to see the New England Patriots win yet another Super Bowl? It’s aggravating, but maybe not as much as the amount of destruction we are all expecting out of Philadelphia Eagles fans should they win their first.

Surely, fans of the other 30 NFL teams can maybe pick a team to cheer for, just maybe not the New York Giants or Atlanta Falcons faithful. New York hates these two teams with a fiery passion. This only adds fuel to the fire of the worst year in Giants football since the dawn of the internet. Basically, the last time Ben McAdoo haircuts were in style.

Hapless Atlanta people may or may not remember that their beloved Dirty Birds have lost their last two playoff games to these two teams. Atlanta and Philadelphia don’t really get along in the NFC Battle of the Birds and whatnot. Plus, 28-3 is one of the worst three-digit numbers there is.

So it could be really bad for these two fan bases to watch. Or you may just want to really party if you love the Eagles or Patriots. These are the two most patriotic nicknames in the NFL, if we’re being totally honest. So, ‘Murica and Dilly Dilly! Here’s a second drinking game you can choose to play for Super Bowl LII. Sequels are the best, especially if you can do both at the same time. Be safe and have fun.

Super Bowl 52 Drinking Game II: Return of the Gronk

• If the telecast mentions Tom vs. Time or The Two Bills, take a sip. Should you have William(s) in your name, well, that means you’re going to have to drink a little bit more as in chug.
• Should there be an N’Sync reunion during Justin Timberlake’s halftime performance, that means waterfall. It’s tearing up my heart that they’re not back together. Dirty Pop.
• Drink anytime Danny Amendola does anything cool, like catch a ball or whatever. Finish your beer if Al Michaels refers to him as Danny and not Amendola.
• Drink if Doug Pederson and his visor challenge a play on the field. If it was a terrible idea like a two-yard completion, take another drink and then proceed to sing the Stu Song from The Hangover. Oh, Doug. Dougie, Doug, Doug!
• First Doritos commercial, you better be drinking because Doritos are delicious and not nutritious.
• Consume your brew if you see a Patriot that clearly hasn’t put a razor to his face in a couple of months. Also if Josh McDaniels removes his visor and just looks like another guy, drink, too.
• Missed field goals and missed PATs require you to imbibe said beverage. If one of the two former Memphian kickers in this games (yes, there are two Memphis kickers in this game. Go Tigers! Rawr!) doink it off the upright, you’re chugging, bro or sis.
• If you see an Eagle wearing a Super Bowl LII Champions hat on top of a German Shepard dog mask, appreciate the strangeness of the moment and really enjoy that sip of your semi-tasty beverage.
• When the game is done and the Patriots win, take a drink for as many seconds as the point deficit they overcame. For example, 28-3 means 25 seconds. If you’re a Saints fan, do that constantly throughout the game, as this is the only way to forget the Minneapolis Miracle, maybe?
• Every single, solitary Peyton Manning commercial requires you to enjoy your beverage. If it’s a Budweiser commercial and should he do a crossover of Dilly Dilly and Chicken Parm you taste so good, sell out, chug your beer and go get another one, you sellout!
• If there is a commercial that involves a dog or a horse, that requires a drink, too. Horses are okay, but dogs are awesome and everybody knows that. And dogs love beer!
• Whenever NBC mentions how freaking cold it is outside of the Vikings’ giant boat football cathedral in Minneapolis, take a sip and appreciate that you are indoors and not frozen.
• If you’re favorite team didn’t make it to the Super Bowl and gets a mention on the telecast, you should be drinking. Get ready for a lot of that, Jaguars and Vikings fans. You were so close! Why couldn’t you do your job and get it done?
• The best cameo in a commercial deserves a drink for you the viewer. It could be anybody. But if it’s a Jeff, like Jeff Bridges, Jeff Daniels or Jeff Goldblum, make that two sips. The Dude, Harry Dunne and the guy that made Independence Day the best 4th of July movie of all-time, thank you, good sirs!
• Every time Chris Long gets a sack that is blown out of proportion, roll your eyes and take a sip. The guy did play for free this year. Also, drink if the broadcast crew mentions that.

I’m not saying that the Super Bowl is going to be awesome. To be honest, I haven’t enjoyed the last two for obvious reasons, but I enjoyed the company I kept in those viewing parties. That’s what it’s really all about. Besides the 4th or July, Super Bowl Sunday is the best American holiday of all time. Why don’t we have Monday off. NO DAYS OFF!!!

Next: Super Bowl 52 Drinking Game I: The Rude Awakening

With these 15 bullet points and the other ones from early in the week, you can mix and match and do whatever with these dirty 30 and have yourself a darn good time. Unless you’re from Beantown or the City of Brotherly Love, it’s not about who wins on Sunday, it’s about having a good time all the time. Like Cosmo Kramer once said at a bar undercover, here’s to feeling good all the time! Be safe and have fun and don’t do anything too stupid. It’s football time!