Former NHLer Nick Boynton shines a light on life after hockey in sobering article
Since retiring from hockey in 2011, former NHL defenseman Nick Boynton has struggled to find peace in his life. Hoping to do so, Boynton recently authored a piece titled Everything’s Not O.K. detailing his experiences on and off the ice.
Look at the guy in that photo. He looks tough, doesn’t he?
Well he is.
His name is Nick Boynton and he played more than 600 games as an NHL enforcer.
At first glance, fans of all ages may feel Nick Boynton is a lucky man. Not only did he get to play in the NHL, but, he actually lived the dream of calling himself a Stanley Cup champion with the Chicago Blackhawks.
Young children, senior superfans and even the occasional FanSided contributor put themselves in Boynton’s shoes and visualize living the same moments. What they don’t realize, however, is luck was not on the hockey player’s side.
Per Boynton, he didn’t particularly enjoy the role he typically served for the various franchises he suited up for.
“In truth, I absolutely hated to fight, I was scared to death of fighting. But what are you supposed to do when that’s your meal ticket, you know?” quotes Boynton.
Considering his role largely entailed “hurting” fellow players, the former blueliner also ate his fair share of punishment throughout his 12-years in the National Hockey League.
Specifically, Boynton recalls having at least 10 “confirmed” concussions, but likely playing through “20 or 30 of them altogether.”
“I just @#**#@! toughed it out every time and kept things moving,” he said.
Furthering the details in his original piece for The Players’ Tribune, Boynton also summarizes his frequent blackouts during live games.
“Later in my career, it got to a point where I started blacking out after I took a big hit to the head….it was scary,” explained Boynton.
“During my final year in the league, I got hit three times, with three punches, and got knocked out all three times,” he adds.
Keeping in mind Boynton was in his early thirties when he retired; the recollection is frightening indeed.
In recent years, the dangers of concussions in high-contact sports has become a focal point in mainstream media. This is highlighted by recent lawsuits correlated to both the NHL and NFL not properly handling head and brain injuries.
One of the more vocal figures on the subject matter has been Boynton’s longtime friend who also played in the NHL, Daniel Carcillo.
Like the author of “Everything’s Not O.K.,” Carcillo has constantly battled with depression over the last few years as well. This was due in large part to the game he once played.
Also congruent to Boynton, Carcillo picked up the pen in 2015 and began sharing his own stories,
“These are our bodies. But everyone is scared to say anything,” he emphasized. “You might not get another NHL contract. So we say ‘yes’ all the time and act like good little boys.”
The physical risks of playing hockey are universally understood by players from all levels, however, what’s often not considered is how these nagging injuries can alter one’s mental health as well.
“Concussions can be a dark, dark place,” he added. “I just recently had one and I fell into a lull and a depression, especially after Monty’s passing.”
Likewise, Boynton constantly makes reference to his mental instability in his piece. “Whenever things get really bad, and I find myself thinking about death, it’s always in the context of release. Escaping the pain… I don’t want to die. But, you know, nothing is for certain.”
The “Monty” Carcillo referred to in the exerpt above is his former teammate and friend, Steve Montador, who passed away a few years ago at the young age of 35.
Though Montador’s death was originally ruled to be without foul play and was strictly health-related, it was later discovered that Montador did, in fact, have severe CTE stemming from his playing-career.
In a sport packed with high-impact collisions, devastating injuries that follow individuals for the rest of their lives are bound to happen. What Boynton’s piece once again reminds us is that even though major sports leagues in North America have some of the best medical personnel working for them, not every injury is handled professionally.
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If no lesson was learned from Keith Primeau taking seven years to feel normal, Marc Savard literally being knocked out of his prime, or multiple CTE-related deaths, will anything even come from Boynton’s efforts have any positive effect?
The future of hockey can only hope so.