NBA Draft 2018: Winners and losers

BROOKLYN, NY - JUNE 21: Luka Doncic speaks to the media after being selected third overall at the 2018 NBA Draft on June 21, 2018 at the Barclays Center in Brooklyn, New York. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and/or using this photograph, user is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License Agreement. Mandatory Copyright Notice: Copyright 2018 NBAE (Photo by Kostas Lymperopoulos/NBAE via Getty Images) /

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NEW YORK, USA – JUNE 21: Fans attend NBA Draft 2018 in Barclays Center in New York, United States on June 21, 2018.(Photo by Mohammed Elshamy/Anadolu Agency/Getty Images) /

Winner No. 5: Adrian Wojnarowski is unkillable

ESPN said Woj couldn’t tweet picks out. This was never going to work, obviously, because Woj’s installed Skynet in his Blackberry in 2011 and has profited off it ever since. He knows the date of your grandchildren’s graduation from high school, and will mail you a personalized letter with that information in 2052. He already has the letter written.

Woj played along, though, and didn’t use the standard tweets for tipping picks five, ten, or fifteen minutes before they happen. Instead, he scoffed at ESPN’s memo, and flippantly tipped every pick using cute terms of his own. Look at the raw power and influence oozing out of this man. A tweet has never more conveyed a sense of “just absolutely AIN’T CARE ABOUT YOUR AUTHORITY, SIR”

Source: The Lakers are unlikely to resist Mo Wagner with the 25th pick.
— Adrian Wojnarowski (@wojespn) June 22, 2018

Look forward to next fall when Woj releases the 2021 draft order by carrier pigeons he lets loose in the Bristol offices. Of course they pooped everywhere. You’ll have to pay to get that cleaned, yes, but Woj still expects the check in the mail on Monday because he owns you, ESPN.

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