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9 Halloween costume ideas for Tiger Woods

By Sam Ofman

PARAMUS, NJ - AUGUST 26: Tiger Woods of the United States plays his shot from the 16th fairway during the final round of The Northern Trust on August 26, 2018 at the Ridgewood Championship Course in Ridgewood, New Jersey. (Photo by Rich Graessle/Icon Sportswire via Getty Images)
PARAMUS, NJ - AUGUST 26: Tiger Woods of the United States plays his shot from the 16th fairway during the final round of The Northern Trust on August 26, 2018 at the Ridgewood Championship Course in Ridgewood, New Jersey. (Photo by Rich Graessle/Icon Sportswire via Getty Images) /
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With all of the action taking place on the other side of the planet, U.S. golf fans finally have a chance to relax and focus on the important stuff. Like Halloween.

Golf can be a scary game. Consider ghoulish island greens, haunted pot bunkers and man-eating non-resident greens fees. Better yet, imagine trying to sink a short putt with Tiger Woods standing at the edge of your peripheral vision. Now that’s terrifying.

Yes, there was a time when the thought of facing Tiger made Tour pros shake in their spikes, but those days are long gone. These days, Tiger needs to up the ante if he wants to put a fright into the competition. This Halloween, I suggest he forego the familiar Sunday red and pick out a more appropriate costume.

Here’s a list of classic costumes Tiger could sport for his annual Halloween chip or treating. I can’t promise they’re all nice, but I can promise they offer cringe-inducing wordplay like “chip or treating.”

Frankenstein: It took about as many surgeries to bring him back to life.

The Creature from the Black Lagoon: It would make for a good excuse to search for this ball.

Werewolf: Imagine the media attention after a tabloid captures a shot of Tiger howling in anguish while arching his back. Bad news for the field: A full moon will rise over Bethpage Black on Moving Day at the PGA Championship, and another after the opening round at Pebble Beach during the 2019 US Open. Last I checked, silver bullets were not PGA sanctioned equipment.

Skeleton: Check out this graphic of Tiger’s injury history and then try to convince me he wouldn’t make a good classroom skeleton. He’s a walking teachable moment for med students.

The Mummy: We’re all afraid his game will unravel. (I warned you about the puns, right?)

Zombie: He already tried this costume by accident, and the way he’s playing now makes it seem like he’s risen from the dead already.

Next. The U.S. Ryder Cup team as Avengers. dark

Ghost: Tiger can skip the bed sheet and toss on a green jacket instead. He’d be the ghost of his former self.

Dracula: Is Tiger a vampire? Well, he did schedule his showdown with Phil Mickelson in prime time, possibly to avoid direct sunlight. While he may not suck your blood, he will bleed us dry with the pay-per-view fees.

Brooks Koepka: He could dress up as someone who actually wins majors these days.

That last one isn’t fair. Tiger appears to be pretty darn good as he returns to form. For years, the scariest thing facing Tour pros has been the threat of Tiger doing exactly that. After his win at the Tour Championship, players are right to be frightened.

Whatever he dresses as, I hope Tiger has a happy, uneventful, in no way newsworthy Halloween.

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