Fansided

Everything you wanted to know about NBA rookie nicknames

By Ian Levy

BOSTON, MA - OCTOBER 22: Robert Williams #44 of the Boston Celtics warms up before the game against the Orlando Magic on October 22, 2018 at the TD Garden in Boston, Massachusetts. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and/or using this photograph, user is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License Agreement. Mandatory Copyright Notice: Copyright 2018 NBAE (Photo by Brian Babineau/NBAE via Getty Images)
BOSTON, MA - OCTOBER 22: Robert Williams #44 of the Boston Celtics warms up before the game against the Orlando Magic on October 22, 2018 at the TD Garden in Boston, Massachusetts. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downloading and/or using this photograph, user is consenting to the terms and conditions of the Getty Images License Agreement. Mandatory Copyright Notice: Copyright 2018 NBAE (Photo by Brian Babineau/NBAE via Getty Images) /
facebooktwitterreddit

A good nickname can really make a player’s career. Which NBA rookies are already set, and who could use a little help in the nickname department?

Robert Williams has played just 25 minutes for the Celtics this season but has been able to maintain a relatively high profile, even among this season’s potentially historically productive rookie class. The thing giving his profile buoyancy is Time Lord, the absolutely splendid nickname he was gifted by Weird Celtics Twitter, and his public hesitancy about fully adopting it.

NBA nicknames are a vast array of physical, linguistic and pop culture references, and can be parsed into a variety of categories. But the truth is, they are as much art as science. Ideally, they capture some fundamental aspect of the player’s style, character or background in a snappy and memorable way. Too often though, they just rely on some lazy wordplay or the most obvious physical attribute.

While Time Lord is on track to become a pantheon-level NBA nickname, the rest of this rookie class offers a fairly unimpressive slate (besides Kevin Huerter as Red Velvet, which is incredible but likely to be disturbingly under-utilized).

Luka Doncic — The Don
Trae Young — Ice Trae
Collin Sexton — Young Bull
Mikal Bridges — Noodles
Donte DiVincenzo — The Big Ragu
Kevin Huerter — Red Velvet
Grayson Allen — G-Money
Landry Shamet — Lanbo
Khryi Thomas — Tazz

Each of those nicknames comes from the player pages at Basketball-Reference. They have an imperfect database but, as far as I know, are the only outlet even attempting to document this important information for the public record. Noodles, for Mikal Bridges, has some oomph but nothing else here moves the emotional needle. Unfortunately, once a nickname lands, it can be difficult to shed and even if something better comes along for these players it will be an uphill battle to supplant what’s already there.

Next. Trae Young, Shai Gilgeous-Alexander, and the importance of context. dark

That’s why it’s so important to lay down a solid nickname before something terrible takes hold. In the interests of serving the public good, I’ve gone through and suggested nicknames for every notable rookie who didn’t have one listed on Basketball-Reference yet. Yes, I broke some of my own rules, and yes, a few of these sound like they were ripped from the brain of Michael Scott. But admit it, there are some winners in here.

Deandre Ayton — Big Fella’
Marvin Bagley — The Bag
Jaren Jackson Jr. — John Jacob Jingleheimer
Mo Bamba — Ritchie (Valens)
Wendell Carter Jr. — Mr. Wendell
Kevin Knox — Foxy Knoxy
Miles Bridges — Smiles
Jerome Robinson — Romy
Shai Gilgeous-Alexander — Michele’s High School Reunion
Michael Porter Jr. — Mike
Lonnie Walker IV — Skywalker
Josh Okogie — Okay (Lil’ Jon voice)
Chandler Hutchison — Hutch (next year’s Bulls rookie is Starsky)
Aaron Holiday — Jrue Holiday’s brother
Anfernee Simons — Simon
Gary Trent — Garfunkel
Moritz Wagner — Wags
Dzanan Musa — Moose
Omari Spellman — Iramo Namlleps

Hey, Kevin Knox. You’re welcome.

Home/NBA