Premier League weekly awards: Maurizio Sarri is on thinning ice

This weekend in the Premier League, Chelsea were humiliated, Tom Heaton impressed and plenty more. Let’s hand out some awards.

The standout result of Premier League matchweek 26 came at the Etihad, where Chelsea were thrashed 6-0 by league leaders Manchester City. Elsewhere, Burnley got a big win, Georginio Wijnaldum scored a beautiful volley and Jamie Vardy made an eventful substitute appearance. Oh yes, and also, as if any further evidence were needed, Wolves-Newcastle reminded us that no one knows the rules of this stupid sport to begin with. Let’s hand out some awards.

The Big Phil Scolari Award for Well, That Took a Turn: Maurizio Sarri

There was a moment at the Etihad on Sunday when Chelsea looked like they were capable of taking points off Manchester City for the second time in as many tries this season. The moment … the moment did not last. The Blues have now lost two and won one of their last three games, by a very ridiculous combined score of 10-5, and Maurizio Sarri is on thin (and thinning) ice. There is of course no shame in losing to City, but conceding four goals to City in 25 minutes and then not even having the common goddamn decency to hold them scoreless in the second half? There is more than a little shame in that. Sarri has remained level-headed, and told reporters on Sunday he “doesn’t know” if he’ll get sacked, which, well, join the club. There is some suggestion Roman Abramovich is no longer the fire-first, ask-questions-later owner he once was, but Chelsea’s form is surely trying his patience.

The David de Gea Award for How Many Saves Is Too Many? Tom Heaton

Burnley’s trip to Brighton was a curious choice for the late time slot on Saturday, but the two sides delivered, playing out the sort of ding-dong, end-to-end, Ashley Barnes-storming contest the Premier League is so invested in leading us to believe is actually representative of the average relegation six-pointer. There was much to like — especially that time James Tarkowski headed the ball point-blank into Ben Mee’s head — but the highlight was Tom Heaton, who has been in excellent form since his return from injury, and was in extra special excellent form on Saturday. He made five saves in total, not quite David De Gea vs. Tottenham levels, but enough to keep one of the stadium’s cameras firmly centered on Joe Hart, smiling blankly on the Clarets bench. This is the manufactured third-choice England goalkeeper selection drama we deserve.

The Dennis Bergkamp Award for Lobs: Georginio Wijnaldum

Georginio Wijnaldum’s Liverpool tenure has been a strange old tactical merry-go-round. He arrived as an attacking midfielder, possibly a winger, only to be converted immediately to a central midfield role. He’s played as a number 6, a number 8, in both a midfield three and a midfield two, and even, on one extra strange occasion, as a center-back. This season, when many expected him to fall out of contention for a starting spot with the arrival of Fabinho and Naby Keita, he has been one of the Reds’ best players. Saturday wasn’t his best performance, but it was by far his best goal for the club, a wonderful, deft lob over Artur Boruc to double Liverpool’s lead.

The Glenn Murray Award for Under-appreciated Goals: Jamie Vardy, Leicester

Jamie Vardy’s most memorable contribution to Leicester’s 3-1 loss away to Tottenham on Sunday was a missed penalty, taken with his first touch of the ball after coming off the bench, that preserved the home side’s 1-0 lead. From there, however, the only way was up — at least for the four minutes until Christian Eriksen made it 2-0. From there, the only way was actually up, and Vardy (sort of) made amends with a tap-in in the 76th minute. The finish was whatever, but the buildup to it was superb, arguably the goal of the weekend, and there was some stiff competition. Claude Puel is, as ever, under pressure, but Leicester have been playing excellent stuff lately, and were unlucky to lose.

The Graham Poll Award for Does Anyone Know The Rules? Graham Scott

Newcastle were denied a crucial three points away to Wolves on Monday, due to 95th-minute winner by Willy Boly, who may or may not have fouled Martin Dubravka while getting on the end of Adama Traore’s cross. The consensus seems to be that while those sorts of comings together usually result in a free-kick awarded to the keeper, no one’s sure why, and besides, Dubravka didn’t exactly cover himself in glory, jumping slowly and low-ly and generally getting bullied by Boly. Was it a foul? Was it not a foul? No one has any idea.