Pablo Sandoval cultivated some serious mass in quarantine (PHOTO)

Pablo Sandoval has fully embraced the Q-Life dad bod over at third base.

Is that Bartolo Colon playing third base? No, it’s Pablo Sandoval!

The San Francisco Giants third basemen has been a two-time All-Star and a three-time World Series champion. Now in his 13th big league season, Sandoval is known for three things: His ability to switch hit, making a ton of money to not be the least bit good for the Boston Red Sox and his iconic nickname, Kung Fu Panda.

At 5-foot-11 at 268 pounds, he’s like the Round Mound of Rebound over there at third base. Has his weight been an issue throughout his entire MLB career? Did Randy Johnson throw wild pitches into his mid-40s? So we shouldn’t be the least bit surprised Sandoval looks like Big Sexy over there at third base, as he cultivated more mass in quarantine than NBA lockout Shawn Kemp.

Though you don’t have to be svelte to be a good big-league ballplayer, as Colon, David Wells and Brian McCann all had success carrying around a little extra poundage, Sandoval looks like Ronald “Mac” McDonald from It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia over there for the Giants. This has to be Photoshopped, right? Then again, this is what a supreme athlete looks like in the new normal.

Pablo Sandoval missed precisely zero meals living his best Q-Life

With it being a 60-game season, there is optimism Sandoval can win his fourth World Series as National League MVP. If John Kruk can hit .300 in his career with impressive gut strength, so can Sandoval. 2020 is already the weirdest year of our lives, so why the hell can’t Sandoval have the greatest year of his life? I mean, he just evolved into the Kung Food Panda like a damn Pokemon!

It’s a crying shame there won’t be an All-Star Game this year because Sandoval would have started at the hot dog corner for the Senior Circuit. When you look like you ate Bill Butler’s Country Breakfast eight days a week, there’s no turning back. Sandoval must embrace the greatest Q-Life dad bod ever cultivated. Paddy’s Pub would be a proud sponsor of this if they were a real thing.

If Sandoval played in the NFL, he’d be like the cheap imitation crab version of Aaron Donald with that frame. The difference between Donald and Sandoval besides mass is Donald is the greatest non-quarterback in football and Sandoval is a three-time champion. It’s good to be the Kung Fu Panda.

This is about to be the craziest season ever and Sandoval’s stomach showed up for the party.