What made baseball fun this week: Reds are hotter than Hansel, Marcus Stroman carrying Cubs
By John Buhler
So this is a thing now?! The Cincinnati Reds are fricking hotter than Hansel now
All it takes is one look to be an international success story. It wasn’t that long ago that the only enjoyable thing about Cincinnati Reds games was the chance somebody would try to take a dump in the Toyota Tundra truck bed proudly displayed beyond the Great American Ball Park outfield wall. Well, these Reds go to 11. They are leading the drunk NL Central, and Cincinnati is loving it!
They are so hot right now that bus driver Joey “Hansel” Votto doesn’t have to wear his seatbelt!
We got you, @JoeyVotto. Safety first! 🫡 pic.twitter.com/HMVgQ69co4
— Cut4 (@Cut4) June 18, 2023
The Bearcats are going Power Five, the Bengals have an indoor practice facility because of Joe Burrow and the Reds are winning walk-offs in front of the late, great iconic David Bowie. If cool dude Billy Zane is impressed, then I’m impressed. But are you cool enough to tell Stranger Things prop Will Byers’ mom that you are really enjoying the conversation but you really have to go pee?
As Veronica Sawyer smokes, and Mr. Robot blows things up, all I have to say about how the Reds are doing is Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice! It’s like being Longfellow Deeds and finding out you are the distant nephew of one Preston Blake. Although Votto won’t let you change his socks, because nobody f***s with the Canadian Jesus, all he needs is his Ron Weasley wig to get going.
Apparently, spending a week at a day spa (D-A-I-Y-E, DAIYE!) was exactly what the Reds needed.