Pop-Tarts continues to understand the assignment with absurd mascots and trophy

A toaster trophy, deranged pastry mascots and college football. That short yet effective sentence accurately sums up the controlled chaos that is the Pop-Tarts Bowl.

The first edition in 2023 successfully went viral when the game's mascot — a literal human dressed in a Pop-Tart costume — was lowered into a giant toaster in a zealot-like sacrifice, resulting in a giant real-life edible pastry popping out of the bottom for the winning team's players to munch on triumphantly.

In 2024, fans got more of the same and oh so much more. Not only was another mascot willingly offered to be consumed, the game's MVP (Iowa State quarterback Rocco Becht) was given the Emperor-like power to pick which of three volunteers would be committed to the giant toaster.

In the end, Becht chose Cinnamon Roll to take the scorching plunge to its shocking glee. Last year's victim — er, martyr — was even given a memorial outside Camping World Stadium in Orlando and, wait for it, an angelic (more like zombie-esque) resurrection mid-game.

Of course, the winning team (Iowa State defeated Miami 42-41) received a trophy to lift but not just any typical trophy. The prestigious prize awarded truly rivals the most iconic in American sports.

The Lombardi, the Stanley Cup, the Larry O'Brien and now, the Pop-Tarts Bowl trophy complete with a built-in working toaster. Yes, you read that correctly. It even has a catapult function to shoot out Pop Tarts (what else?) when toasted to perfection.

The Pop Tarts Bowl is the newest addition to modern Americana and college football should be thankful

As many online have declared, "the European mind can't comprehend the Pop-Tarts Bowl." In what is now seen as a genius marketing move emerged from an era of oversaturated corporate sponsorship of the college football postseason, Pop Tarts has become synonymous with the sport in just two short years. Eventually, it will be ingrained in the American psyche just as the Rose Bowl and the Army-Navy game have been for decades.

Fans now look forward to this game as if it were part of the coveted College Football Playoff despite the participants having no shot at being crowned national champions.

Because of the absurd and plain fun approach the sponsors have taken towards the contest, programs and fans get a reprieve in the midst of what can be a lacking and snooze-filled non-playoff bowl season.

The build-up, the antics and the football combine for an entertaining atmosphere unmatched by any other competition in the sport. Whatever mad science they're cooking up in the Pop-Tarts marketing meetings, keep it up, please.