1. If Jim Harbaugh can't win in Chicago, dump this franchise into the lake
Depending on how the legal situation shakes out over in the Big Ten, there is a chance Jim Harbaugh could leave Ann Arbor for Chicago, just like he did in the 1980s. Is history repeating itself? Are we living in a simulation? Probably, but like with most scientific things, I cannot prove this. Regardless, if Harbaugh is not allowed to coach at Michigan any longer, the Bears needed to hire him yesterday...
Although he may have had more success as a player with the Indianapolis Colts in the early-to-mid-1990s, Harbaugh was drafted out of Michigan by the Bears. It is one of two NFL franchises he is most closely associated with as a player, along with the Las Vegas Raiders and the San Francisco 49ers from during his coaching career. Harbaugh has shown he can win in the most dire of circumstances.
If I were running the Bears, I would punt on the latest installment of head coach Matt, GM Ryan and tell president Kevin his services are no longer needed. Go get Harbaugh and find a general manager he will not clash with right away so that he can draft his quarterback J.J. McCarthy out of Michigan somewhere inside the top 10. McCarthy is a native Chicagoan as well. This is too perfect not to work!
If Harbaugh and McCarthy cannot turn the Bears' fortunes around, dump this franchise into the lake.