7 best moments from the Netflix roast of Tom Brady
For those who may have missed it, Netflix had a special roast session involving NFL legend Tom Brady, and the night and event were downright hilarious.
Some of the best and brightest roasters came to town, and several of Brady's former teammates and coaches were on hand for the big event. All in all, the stars shined. There were jokes, SEVERAL jokes. Robert Kraft was even in attendance, dropping a line about Tom Brady owning the Raiders and mentioning how Las Vegas parted ways with Jimmy G to appease Brady.
The majority were downright hilarious, but there were a few that crossed the ethical line. But that's the only problem of the night, that and going at Drew Bledsoe's injury that could have nearly killed him. Everything else? Pefection to a crisp. Let's take a look at five other spectacular moments from a night of drop-dead laughter.
Tom Brady got roasted on Netflix and it was hilarious. Here are the top moments from the night
No. 7: Kim Kardashian gets the Roger Goodell treatment
Was Roger Goodell at the event? How many boos did Kim get? Long story short, a LOT. Kardashian stepped to the stage while recognizing, according to the Hollywood Reporter, rumors about the two being in a relationship. Here's a fun fact. They are NOT. However, Kardashian did joke about "releasing a tape" while dropping one joke about her family having to defend an athlete that drew gasps and laughs.
For those unaware, Robert Kardashian, Kim's father, was on O.J. Simpson’s defense team during the latter’s murder trial back in the 90s. Simpson has since passed away from cancer. Was it the best joke of the night? No. But it was still worthy of mentioning, considering the Simpson case is still talked about to this day. Kardashian didn't drop jaws like her fellow comedians of the night, but at this point, they'd have taken anyone to take a shot at Brady.
No. 6: Jeff Ross NEARLY gets the Chris Rock treatment
Were we really going to see another Will Smith to Chris Rock moment? Nah, Tom Brady doesn't have Jada as a spouse. Matter of fact he's divorced. There's no way Giselle would have allowed that. But what was so funny from Jeff Ross? The massage joke about Brady and Robert Kraft. If you didn't see it live, just know that Brady walked up to Ross and whispered that he shouldn't go that route again.
THAT is the right way to do it. Or, Brady could have gone to Ross after the show and let him know. However, one of the main rules in comedy is NEVER interrupting a roast. Brady may have missed that rule in the clause, but for every other joke he didn't say a word, so he gets a free pass. Still, Ross was hilarious on the night, and thank the forces above we didn't see a Chris Rock-Will Smith moment.
No. 5: Kevin Hart kicks it off with a bang and warning shot
Who better than Kevin Hart to lead the show? After all, the comedian may be small in size, but big in impact. Hart had some epic quotes, including the situation with cryptocurrency and how Brady's investment in it went down the drain. Brady, according to Hart, cannot attend a game at Crypto.com arena as the fans would just lose their mind.
But Hart's best line was how Brady ruined so many Sundays for football fans who had to play against him. Now Hart says they were going to ruin him instead? Yeah, right. Keep in mind, Brady's amount of victories got several teams stuck with losing records, prompting several coaches getting the axe and teams having to start over and over again just to find a combination to beat No. 12. Sure, Hart's Philadelphia Eagles got the better of Tom in Super Bowl LII, but Brady did beat the Eagles in Super Bowl XXXIX. Just saying.
No. 4: Bill Belichick trolls before and after
Before the night even began, former Patriots QB Drew Bledsoe and head coach Bill Belichick came face to face in the back where once again, Belichick rolled with Brady. That was hilarious, but what about when Brady had to hear when Belichick dissed "The Dynasty" Apple series, calling it a "hit job"? Belichick didn't get mad, but lord have mercy he got even.
If that wasn't enough, the old ball coach went at some of his former players including tight end Rob Gronkowski, asking Gronk to "not do his job" on FOX, inciting howling laughter from the panel. Belichick went at Danny Amendola for his role in "The Dynasty". Long story short, the hoodie can be a hooligan. The NFL 100 series long ago should have been an indication that Belichick had a humorous side to him.
To cap it all off, Belichick and Kraft shared a shot at the end of the night, to which Kevin Hart jumped and called out "a Black man made that happen!". Well done Kevin, and it was kind of refreshing to see Robert Kraft and Bill Belichick show a sign of truce in the moment. Was it genuine? We may never know.
No. 3: Peyton Manning battles Tom Brady one more time
Respect? Check. Competitive? Check. Both qualities of Peyton Manning and Tom Brady. Who better than No. 18 to come to the stage and take a shot at No. 12? Manning made a cameo towards the conclusion of the broadcast, teasing Brady about his defeats in two Super Bowls against Eli, notably Super Bowl XLII. Manning even talked about his kids using the bathroom and instead of taking a dump, it was "taking a Brady".
Ouch. BUT ... you didn't think Tom wouldn't want a bit of payback right? Oh yes. Brady mentioned Manning's time in Denver and his birth in Louisiana, but dropped the epic line: "you will always live in my shadow." A fitting end to the moment. Brady did the better of Manning in terms of on-the-field record, though Manning won the final contest between the two in the 2015 AFC Title Game. Roast or no roast, these two will always be linked to each other and both showed class on the night.
No. 2: Nikki Glaser goes at TB12 and steals the show with legendary roasts
Outside of the "hanging" joke, there was no comedian at the event more funny than Nikki Glaser. Apologies to Kevin Hart, Ron Burgundy and the rest of the folks. Nikki was the main event. First up, the 2006 split of Brady and Bridget Moynahan. Glasser mentioned Brady's retirement, citing "It’s hard to walk away from something that isn’t your pregnant girlfriend." Ouch. Keep in mind, at the time the two split well before Moynahan discovered she was pregnant with their now-16-year-old son, Jack.
Outside of the jokes, including one about Taylor Swift, Glaser was rather respectful of TB12. Glaser cited how Brady began his NFL career starting as a sixth-round draft pick and how he was constantly written off by pundits, analysts, etc. If anything was learned, don't doubt Tom Brady. Kudos to Glaser on that note for coming in hot with the roasts but showing a rather kinder side in the process.
No. 1: Tom Brady steals the show and shuts it down
Finally, the man himself gets to speak. Once he got his shot, the GOAT did NOT hold back. After everyone had their chance, No. 12 was given a chance to respond, and he did it all. To Kevin Hart, he brought up Dave Chapelle and asked him to host. Brady responded to "Deflategate" with Roger Goodell, although not admitting one ounce of guilt despite what social media believed.
Brady got in a few shots at Belichick after the coach brought up Alex Guererro. Brady even went at his former teammates including several digs at Gronk and Edelman (who pulled off a hilarious Belichick impersonation).
Brady took a swing and delivered with a hit at the Buffalo Bills and their fanbase, i.e., the Mafia. "Doesn't the mafia need a ring to kiss?" Brady let it go on that, considering the Bills have a 3-33 record against Brady over his tenure. However, the one about the Kansas City Chiefs was pure gold, and it triggered the "Swifties".
On Kansas City fans: “You say your stadium is the loudest. It helps when all your fans are 14-year-old girls. And in honor of Tay-Tay [Taylor Swift], let’s take a look at the Chiefs ‘eras’: terrible for 50 years, good for five. Shake it off.”
That right there is a mic-drop, and something says the folks in Arrowhead will be angry, not as angry as they were after Super Bowl LV or the AFC Title game when Dee Ford was offside and several folks had "Brady retirement" posters up after pundits boasted that the Pats couldn't go into Arrowhead and win. They did. On a night of roasting the GOAT, it was the GOAT who took a shot and ended up with the last laugh.