Dream, fever dream and nightmare scenarios: Our 8 boldest Eagles predictions for the 2024 season

After starting the season with a 10-1 record, the Philadelphia Eagles had a historic collapse and finished the season with just 11 wins. It was a nightmare, but you already knew that. 

The past is the past. Let’s break the rearview mirrors off our cars so we’re never tempted to look back, only forward. The best way to do that is by making bold predictions on what’s to come in the next four months. We’re going to split them into three categories: Dream, fever dream, and nightmare scenarios.

Dream scenarios are regular, bold predictions. They’re predictions that if you said them out loud, someone would fist bump you and say, ‘Yeah … that’d be sick.’ Fever dream scenarios are the mega-bold predictions. Those are the ones that would make someone spit on your feet and say, ‘Get help, sicko. That'll never happen.’

Nightmare scenarios are exactly what they sound like, and they’re familiar; they’re a gross future that fills you with vitriol, fear, and anguish. We don’t like to think about those, but we have to anyway.

Philadelphia Eagles: Dream scenarios

Everyone looks like they’re having fun

This shouldn’t have to be a dream, but it unfortunately is. The Eagles were overwhelmed by the Super Bowl hangover last year and because of that, it looked like everyone was walking on eggshells. There weren’t very many good touchdown celebrations, the Mic'd Ups were more motivational than they were entertaining, and people were arguing with each other on the sideline entirely too often. 

Let’s get back to fun. Let’s see smiles. Let’s hear Sirianni cuss at refs rather than fans. Let’s see DeVonta Smith rob the Salvation Army bucket in Dallas. 

The Eagles limit usage of the Brotherly Shove

The Brotherly Shove is the best and most effective play in the Eagles’ playbook. This isn’t a criticism of the play. This is a criticism of Nick Sirianni’s affinity to it. 

Last season, during the Week 15 Monday Night Football game at Seattle, Christian McCaffrey was a guest on the ManningCast. He was asked to predict the next play the Eagles were going to run, and he said that it would be a QB draw. What should come as a shock to absolutely nobody, it was a QB draw. 

Later on that week, Sirianni was asked about the predictability of his offense because of CMC’s comment. After praising CMC’s football IQ, Sirianni essentially said that it was a good guess because they’ve never run a QB draw out of that formation and that they were trying to run a play to set up a 4th-and-short or a first down. His comment is at the 19:31 mark in the video below: 

Your priorities are backwards and that’s psychotic. Yes, it’s good to have a play with an incredibly high success rate and it’s good to think that every new set of downs is more of a 1st-and-9 rather than a 1st-and-10, but to only aim for nine yards is truly foolish. You shouldn’t have to beg for a coach to go for a first down.

Luckily, the offense isn’t Sirianni’s anymore. We can only hope that in their meetings, Sirianni didn’t instill upon Kellen Moore that the offense should aim for a Brotherly Shove.

When the play is necessary it’s totally fine to use it. Hell, if it’s 2nd-and-goal from the one-yard line, use it two or three times because it’ll eventually work. Just don’t make it your goal to use the play.

Brandon Graham goes out on a high note

Brandon Graham is a hero. He had the most impactful play during the franchise’s most important game when he strip-sacked Tom Brady in the fourth quarter of Super Bowl LII. This is Brandon Graham’s last season in the NFL and nothing would be sweeter than if he went out smiling his big beautiful smile.

Both Jason Kelce and Fletcher Cox, two heroes in their own right, retired after the pathetic end to the 2023 season. They deserved to go out better than that. It would be hard to handle if the Eagles had another legendary player retire after a horrible season.

Philadelphia Eagles: Fever dream scenarios

C.J. Gardner-Johnson leads the NFL in interceptions

In 2022, safety C.J. Gardner-Johnson was part of a three-way tie for the most interceptions (6) in the NFL despite only playing 12 games. They weren’t all the prettiest picks and some of them were a ‘right place at the right time’ thing, but he did catch the balls which is not a given for defensive backs. 

That 2022 defense was Jonathan Gannon’s scheme which is reminiscent of Vic Fangio’s scheme. If C.J.-G.J. can get the same opportunities based on the defensive scheme as he did in 2022, he’ll continue to be in the right place at the right time.  

It also helps that the Eagles aren’t exactly playing the “who’s who" of quarterbacks this year: Jordan Love, Kirk Cousins in prime time [fart noise], Derek Carr [fart noise], Baker Mayfield [respectful fart noise], Deshaun Watson [grossed-out fart noise], Daniel Jones [big fart noise], Joe Burrow, Trevor Lawrence [fart noise, but not too loud in respect for Doug Pederson], Dak Prescott [fart noise], Jayden Daniels [rookie fart noise], Matthew Stafford [old fart noise], Lamar Jackson, Bryce Young [fart noise], and Russell Wilson but probably Justin Fields [double fart noise].

There are three, maybe four quarterbacks on that list that strike fear in your heart. C.J. should be able to ball-hawk almost everyone else.

Jalen Carter wins Defensive Player of the Year

After starting his rookie season incredibly strong, Jalen Carter’s production tapered off. To be fair, the entire team’s production tapered off, but Carter’s was pretty predominant given how dominant he was through the first half of the season. 

He was just two votes shy of winning the AP’s Defensive Rookie of the Year. The last time a defensive tackle received votes for DROY was Aaron Donald in 2014 (which he won). It’s wrong to say the same as arguably the best defensive player in the history of the NFL, but it’s not wrong to say he’s comparable at this point in his career.

Typically, defensive tackles have slow starts to their professional careers. They’re coming into a league where offensive linemen are bigger, faster, and stronger than the ones they just faced in college. For Jalen Carter to be able to come into the NFL and immediately annihilate opposing offensive lines is a feat in itself. 

He ended up slamming face-first into the rookie wall, but our Baby Rhino isn’t a rookie anymore. Now he knows the grind that’s coming and as a leader on the defensive line, he can be the first Eagle to win the AP DPOY since Reggie White in 1987.

Saquon Barkley breaks the Eagles single-season rushing record

LeSean McCoy set the Eagles single-season rushing record at 1,607 yards from 314 carries back in 2013. That was the year of the 'Snow Bowl' where he set the Eagles single-game rushing record at 217 yards. So yes, this record is going to be extraordinarily difficult to break.

For Saquon to do this, he’ll have to rush for an average of 94 yards per game. It sounds daunting, but there are three reasons it can maybe happen.

First: This is the best offense that he's ever played on. He is surrounded by the best weapons, he has the best offensive line he’s ever had, and he’ll be in the backfield with a quarterback who is a run threat, and the offense will (read: should) be built around Jalen Hurts’ ability to run. 

Defenses have a much more difficult time defending a ground game when they have to worry about both a quarterback and a running back. Saquon should be able to get in space and be explosive.

Second: This is what Saquon is here for. The Eagles are paying Saquon $12.5 million per year and they don’t have to worry about saving his legs. When he was a young gun in New York, he was an asset that needed to be maintained. Now, he’s a tool that got paid big money to help a team win a Super Bowl. 

The Eagles shouldn’t be conservative with worrying about Saquon’s wear and tear for his production two or three years down the road. He’ll be a three-down back and he’ll get as many carries as the team needs. 

Third: Kellen Moore’s offense is capable of producing a top-tier running back. In 2019, when Kellen Moore was the offensive coordinator with the Cowboys, Ezekiel Elliott had 1,357 yards on 301 carries through 16 games. Saquon is better than Zeke, so.. Yeah. Checkmate. 

This fever dream can be a reality, however feverish it is. Side note: On DraftKings, Saquon Barkley’s rushing total is set at 1000.5 yards (-110), so do with that information what you will.

Nightmare scenarios

Darius Slay's age catches up to him

Last season, James Bradberry's age showed. He had just turned 30, and he lost his step. It was hard to watch, especially after an amazing 2022 season. Darius 'Big Play' Slay is going to turn 34 on Jan. 1, 2025.

Cornerbacks play on an island, so when they get beat, it's very apparent. When a cornerback loses their speed everything gets even more emphasized. There's no doubt that one day Slay will lose it, but he's made it past his early-30s so why couldn't he make it to his mid-30s?

Slay is CB1, a vocal leader, and one of his jobs this year is to help develop the younger cornerbacks on the team. He has a lot of responsibilities and he doesn't need the added pressure of losing his step. Let's get one more year, Big Play. Just one more year.

We’ve seen the best of Jalen Hurts

Not a whole lot needs to be said about this because we don’t want to focus on a nightmare this terrible. Let’s stay positive for now. The season hasn't started yet and we’ll have four months to lay into guys. 

That being said, Jalen looked markedly different in 2023 from 2022. He had a bone bruise on his knee that happened early on, and he dealt with that the whole season. So maybe that had something to do with it. Maybe it didn’t. Maybe Jalen’s 2022 was the equivalent of Carson Wentz’s 2017. Maybe that was his peak. 

For Jalen’s whole career, he’s had Jason Kelce calling the protections for the offensive line. This year that responsibility is going to fall on Jalen’s shoulders. If you mix that with yet another new offensive coordinator in his ear, it wouldn’t be nuts if we saw him struggle early on in the season. 

It’s just important that if early-season struggles do come, Jalen doesn’t let them stack and compound into something bigger.

This is Jalen Hurts we’re talking about here and he won’t let bad things happen to us again. We can’t have two nightmare seasons in a row … right?