Just because it is Super Bowl Sunday does not mean you will not have to work tomorrow. If you are having a case of the Mondays for the ages, then I recommend you make your semi-daily trek to Dunkin to get ... whatever it is you get there. I went there to start Super Bowl Sunday off the right way, and I haven't been the same since. For better or worse, you are going to get some Dunkin tomorrow!
You may have the power of free will, but do you really? You are a consumer, and one who has absolutely no control when it comes to stupendously good advertising. So when Dunkin decided that you needed a commercial featuring some of Boston's finest, you stood no chance. Tom Brady was joined by the dynamic duo of Ben Affleck and Matt Damon to push something you likely didn't need.
It was boy band-ish, but I was honestly too distracted by Dunkin's one-of-a-kind color scheme of orange and pink. The fact Affleck, Brady and Damon were wearing such tremendous garb almost got me to forget that Affleck's wife Jennifer Lopez was in a recording studio or something. Look. I don't know what they were selling. All I know is that they sold me on it, and I want a Dunkin jacket yesterday.
Waiting for tonight to end, just know that love don't cost a thing, so long as that thing is Dunkin.
Affleck has paid a lot for love, so I know he's going to be at Dunkin the first thing he does tomorrow.
The DunKings are the greatest Massachusetts boyband since NKOTB
Whatever The DunKings got, they've got the right stuff. They are not exactly New Kids on the Block, but Affleck, Brady and Damon as Dunkin spokespeople is the type of viral content my soul craves. You may love yourself some mornings. You may also hate yourself on other mornings. But for as long as there is morning, or mid-to-late afternoon for the rest of us degenerates, there is always Dunkin.
There is always money in the banana stand, and there is always Dunkin. They take breakfast more seriously than anyone who is super cereal. Like if you like to eat frosted oats or something that doesn't have meats in it, you can just stay home! That's because I need to take my car through the Dunkin drive-thru faster than Brady can lead the Patriots offense downfield and into the end zone.
The only way this would have been better than liking apples of course, is if Affleck and Brady went back in time with those DunKings shirts and wore them throughout their time as fallen angels in Dogma. I don't know how Snape or Alanis Morissette would have handled it, but all I know is that Alanis would have screamed like rain on her wedding day. She should have been in the commercial...
There is a reason why Dunkin tracks how many times you've been to a store of theirs in a month...