5 Billy Napier replacements the Florida Gators already need on speed-dial

What could go wrong did go wrong for Billy Napier in his season debut at Florida. The Gators looked like a smoked reptile that was left out and forgotten in a PDQ parking lot. This marquee non-conference game between in-state rivals Florida and Miami showed where the best football resides in The Sunshine State and where one who will be looking for a new head coach in November is located.

There were other terrible losses across the Power Four in Week 1, including on Monday night in Tallahassee involving another major in-state rival in the Florida State Seminoles. However, Florida entered this season with very low expectations to begin with, as well as the toughest schedule in college football. They still have to play Florida State and UCF, in addition to an eight-game SEC slate.

I almost feel bad for Napier. I mean, the man couldn't even open a water bottle. It was like watching Patrick Star trying to take the lid off a jar or Buster Bluth trying to fend for himself after his mother went to luxurious white-collar prison for middle-aged ladies. He used to be a well-respected coach at Louisiana and as an Alabama assistant before that. Now nobody wants anything to do with the guy.

Here are five way-too-early candidates to replace the increasingly ineffective head coach at Florida.

5. South Florida Bulls head coach Alex Golesh

Alex Golesh is one year and a game into his head-coaching career. Normally, I would not put him on a shortlist of candidates for a highly volatile job like Florida. However, he does have a few things working in his favor. First, have you seen USF football lately? They went from the epitome of suck under his predecessor Jeff Scott, into being a serious contender to potentially win The American.

Golesh is not only in-state but used to coach at another rival program in UCF prior to following his mentor Josh Heupel to Tennessee from Orlando. Add in the fact that he graduated from Ohio State, and Golesh has the right kind of football background to work anywhere. He may not be quite ready for this job, but Steve Spurrier had only been at Duke and Urban Meyer was only leading the Utah Utes.

To be fair, Golesh is probably nothing more than a dark horse, tertiary candidate for the position. After all, didn't Florida higher an up-and-coming offensive mind who was doing great things as a head coach at the Group of Five previously? That is the biggest thing working against Golesh. However, I full expect him to be leading a Power Four team by the 2027 college season at the absolute latest.

Sadly, for obvious Napier reasons, Florida might miss out on a really strong candidate in-state.

4. Ole Miss Rebels head coach Lane Kiffin

For my money, Florida's ideal candidate to replace Billy Napier long-term is an offensive mind of a Power Four school who is having tremendous success but could be capped by what his school's inherent limitations clearly are. I think we need to see this season play out first before we potentially see Lane Kiffin leave a pretty sweet gig at Ole Miss for the right to be Florida's newest punching bag.

All things equal, for as dysfunctional as Florida is as a program, the Gators have better resources than Ole Miss. This is because they are the only SEC school in Florida, whereas Ole Miss has to split up blue-chippers players in-state with arch-rival Mississippi State. Going to Florida would be a way for Kiffin to stick it to Tennessee again, as well as try his best to get on Georgia's level at some point.

To me, I think Kiffin has enough self-awareness now to realize how truly toxic this Florida post is. Since Urban Meyer abruptly retired, Will Muschamp, Jim McElwain, Dan Mullen and now Billy Napier have been eaten alive by this job. Kiffin may have Teflon skin now, but the man who once coined the phrase of getting tarmac-ed may not want to go back to Florida. He did thrive previously at FAU...

The only reason Kiffin would leave a pretty good thing at Ole Miss is if Florida pays out the wazoo.

3. Missouri Tigers head coach Eliah Drinkwitz

Eliah Drinkwitz was the last name of five I arrived at. The other four came to me pretty quickly, but I was looking for the right head-coaching candidate on the rise who might take the bait and leave his Power Four job for this one in Gainesville. To me, Matt Rhule is too new at Nebraska to be the opportunist he is and bolt. Mike Locksley might be a dark horse here, but he also hails from The DMV.

The reason I went with Drinkwitz is his Alpha Nerd brand feels somewhat impenetrable, or enough to the point where he is buying what he is selling. Winning like he has of late at Missouri is not easy. He has taken advantage of Iowa being so incredibly stubborn in recruitment. St. Louis is now a Missouri town, and he is able to get many of the players he wants from Kansas City, and out-of-state as well.

Drinkwitz is like Billy Napier's predecessor Dan Mullen, in that he has won quite a bit at another SEC school of note, just not as long or at as difficult of a job as Mississippi State usually is. If Missouri wins around 10 games and pushes for the College Football Playoff this year, I could see Drinkwitz pricing his way out of Missouri. He could be the cure to what ails the Gators, or another guy without a chance.

This potential hiring could work, but with any type of heel turn, there is a ton of variance with that.

2. UCF Knights head coach Gus Malzahn

Look. It doesn't really matter what the UCF Knights do this year under Gus Malzahn. I know that he can coach, just like he was unrightfully ousted after a winning season at Auburn during a COVID year. Malzahn immediately resurfaced at UCF, where he helped the Knights transition from being a big bad bully in the Group of Five out of The American, into being Big 12 newcomer still finding its way of late.

Like Hugh Freeze was at Liberty, I am sure Malzahn would love nothing more than to get one more shot at leading an SEC team. The good news for him is he would be a perfect candidate for any one of three potential openings: Arkansas, Florida and South Carolina. Arkansas would be his top choice, and he should be the Hogs' top candidate should it become crystal clear that Sam Pittman must go.

South Carolina is not an easy job, but everything I have seen out of Malzahn leads me to believe that he could be better than Shane Beamer on his best day, possibly even rival Steve Spurrier during his peak in Columbia. Even if UCF went 6-6 this season, Malzahn is going to be in highly pursued in the coaching market. He may end up getting a raise to stay in Orlando, but Florida could be opening up.

If Arkansas does not open up and UCF wants to cut corners financially, then I would look to Florida.

1. Washington Huskies head coach Jedd Fisch

It is not even close. The best candidate to replace Billy Napier at Florida is the most obvious one. That would be new Washington Huskies head coach Jedd Fisch. While leaving Washington after only one season would be seen as highly controversial, that is what the man who hired him did in Troy Dannen. Dannen left Washington after five months to replace Trev Alberts over at his alma mater of Nebraska.

Maybe Fisch jives with new athletic director Pat Chun? Regardless of if that happens, Florida is his alma mater, and his alma mater needs one of its own to make this football team whole again. Fisch was a student assistant for Steve Spurrier when he was in undergrad during the 1990s. His roommate a UF was none other than Philadelphia Eagles general manager Howie Roseman. Let that sink in a bit.

No, Fisch is not a blatant job hopper. He put in a few great years transforming the Arizona Wildcats from hot garbage into one of the 20 best teams in the country. Washington is a better job than Arizona, but you could argue that Florida still has a higher upside than Washington, especially now that U-Dub plays in the same Big Ten that features Michigan and Ohio State across the country.

While Fisch to Gainesville feels inevitable like death and taxes, we need this season to unfold first.