Ranking the best MLB Players' Weekend custom bats: Yelich understood the assignment

While you could rightfully question MLB's marketing and raising awareness of Players' Weekend, it's here and it's going to be a great time. Baseball fans have seen several iterations of this weekend but we are set up for a fun time around the league. Specifically, it seems like what fans are anticipating the most is players being able to use custom bats for MLB Players' Weekend.

Now that the weekend is about to get fully underway, though, we've started to see many of the custom bats that will be used either get leaked or posted online. And let's just be real, it's been wildly entertaining to see what some of the players -- and, likewise, various bat manufacturers -- have been able to conjure up and pull off.

We can't just leave it there, though! We're putting these custom bats for MLB Players' Weekend up to the test against one another. And what we've come up with is a definitive (or, you know, absolutely and totally subjective) ranking of the nine best custom bats we'll see in the batter's box for this event.

MLB Players' Weekend custom bats: Ranking the best in baseball

9. Everyone with the same No. 2 Pencil bat

Playing a day game against the Cubs on Friday, Blue Jays utilityman Ernie Clement got first dibs on the No. 2 Pencil bat that was designed for this weekend, so we'll let you see it in his hands.

Make no mistake, it's an exceptionally cool bat. But it'd be a helluva lot cooler if there were some originality and there weren't multiple players using the same design. Ryan Jeffers, Taylor Ward, Clement and several others have this model, which is why it's coming in last in our rankings.

8. Captain America gets some love from Josh Jung

I'm not going to be one of those people who acts like they're better than the MCU. I love the Infinity Saga as much as the next movie-goer and was there on opening weekend more often than not for those films. Having said that, Rangers infielder Josh Jung broke out the Captain America bat and it's fine but not totally moving the needle.

My distaste for that bat relative to many of the rest, though, it does make me desperately want the Arlington-area media to ask Jung his thoughts about Robert Downey Jr.'s return to the MCU as Dr. Doom.

7. Brandon Marsh shows... himself? some love

Does Brandon Marsh have a pretty instantaneously recognizable look? Of course! When you combine the beard with the wet hair, there's little mistaking who that is out there for the Phillies. Having said that, putting your own likeness on a custom bat is certainly a choice.

Fade me with the self promotion. That's not what I'm here for and not what I gravitate toward when I'm trying to essentially grade custom bats. We want a cool reference or homage, not just the players' face on the lumber.

6. Harrison Bader will try to color between the lines

A little bit better than the No. 2 pencil bats is the custom crayon bats like the pink one that Mets outfielder Harrison Bader will have on his shoulder this weekend. The design is equally as clean but there's just something a bit better about it than the pencil in my estimation.

Most specifically, I like that this design can be replicated in the color of a player's choosing. That's instant variety that simply isn't there with the pencil bats that we've seen, so I'm giving the crayon a pretty decisive edge there.

5. Bryce Harper makes his bats a family affair

Fine, we'll get a bit sappy and sentimental here. Bryce Harper's kids may not necessarily have the most acute artistic skills right now -- which is a statement of fact and not at all a slight at them given their age! -- but giving his children the opportunity to draw and color the designs for his bats is a truly heartwarming touch by the Phillies superstar. They're crayon bats too but with that special added touch.

It's always a joy to see professional baseball players and athletes alike give us a peek behind the curtain into their lives as human beings. This is that in some ways with Harper showing his kids some real love.

4. Cal Raleigh just became an even bigger Seattle icon

If you polled the entire city of Seattle, two things that would likely have a near-unanimous approval rating would be A. Bringing back the Seattle Supersonics and B. Mariners catcher Cal Raleigh. So it's only fitting that the man lovingly dubbed "Big Dumper" is telling the sports world to bring the Sonics back with his custom bat.

The legend of Cal Raleigh grows almost to the size of his famous backside.

3. Bobby Witt Jr. gives shouts to a real (backyard) baseball legend

Many a baseball fan of a certain age has exceptionally fond memories of dominating the Backyard Baseball PC game of yesteryear with the legend Pablo Sanchez. Royals superstar Bobby Witt Jr. must be among them because he gave Sanchez the proper credit and love with his custom bat, making it all about the video game star.

Sanchez was an unstoppable force in that game. So for Witt, who has a 1.009 OPS and is firmly in the AL MVP conversation this season, to be paying homage is perfectly fitting. He might as well be Pablo Sanchez himself in Kansas City.

2. The Force is with Jackson Merrill and the Padres

Potential NL Rookie of the Year and rising Padres star Jackson Merrill should give Josh Jung some lessons on how to pay homage to something from "fan culture". Merrill is unleashing a custom Star Wars bat that's designed to look like a lightsaber. But the coup de grace to make this bat one of the best of Players' Weekend (if it wasn't going to be already) is that it also glows in the dark!

What more do I need to say after you've seen that? That's immediately among the coolest things I've ever seen come near a baseball diamond.

1. Christian Yelich's Bob Uecker bat is utter perfection

Besting Merrill's lightsaber bat is no small feat but Brewers star Christian Yelich managed to do exactly that. How? Naturally, by giving the iconic Milwaukee broadcaster and one of the stars of the Major League film series, Bob Uecker, a huge shoutout. Uecker gets his likeness on the bat along with one of his unforgettable and oft-used lines from those movies, "Juuuuust a bit outside!" in addition to some of his memorable real-life calls.

What can I say? I freakin' love Bob Uecker. So this immediately jumped to the top of the rankings the moment I saw it. Merrill's bat gave Yelich a run but it's still not enough to top Uecker.

BONUS: Shohei Ohtani shows his dog love with his cleats

Okay, one more inclusion that doesn't officially get ranked because it's not a bat. Rather, it's Dodgers superstar Shohei Ohtani giving his famous dog, Decoy, the love and attention that a good pupperino deserves on his cleats for Players' Weekend.

It's almost impossible for Ohtani not to go yard at least once for LA this weekend wearing those, right?