Premier League winners and losers from Matchday 24: Arsenal stomp City, Chris Wood's career year

If the Champions League is like the dinner you get at a fancy restaurant, the domestic leagues are more like the humbler meals you make for yourself at home. They may not have the trimmings and the nice lighting, but they’re every bit as crucial to your survival.

We’re back with Premier League action this weekend, so let’s see what unfolded.

Premier League winners from Matchday 24

Chris Wood

His hat trick against Brighton gives him 17 goals so far this season, a career high for him and tied for third among Premier League players, behind only Mohamed Salah and Erling Haaland. The last Nottingham Forest player to score three goals during a home game was Nigel Clough back in 1987. At this rate, you’d have to call the big Kiwi the greatest New Zealand player ever.

Arsenal

On one hand, you could say the 5-1 scoreline flattered the Gunners since three of those goals came from breathtaking finishes by Myles Lewis-Skelly, Kai Havertz, and Ethan Nwaneri. On the other hand, it could have been worse, as Stefan Ortega’s first-half giveaway to Havertz should have resulted in a goal. Arsenal have lost games that title contenders shouldn’t lose this season, but this was the sort of game that title winners win, whether or not the Gunners actually chase down Liverpool or not. 

Myles Lewis-Skelly

His red card from last week was overturned so he could play in this match. He was terrific even without his first-ever goal for Arsenal. When these teams met five months ago, the teenager tried to step to the much larger Erling Haaland, and the big Norwegian rudely asked, “Who the f--- are you?” There’s Lewis-Skelly’s answer, along with the Zen pose mocking one of Haaland’s goal celebrations.

Jean-Philippe Mateta

The Crystal Palace man had an excellent first half against Manchester United, but he hadn’t found the back of the net. The Frenchman finally broke through in the second half with a rebound shot and a breakaway opportunity that Daniel Muñoz squared for him for the brace that gave his team the win at Old Trafford.

Filip Jörgensen

The youngster replaced Robert Sánchez in Chelsea’s net and made four routine saves and no mistakes in the Blues’ win over West Ham. On the one score he did give up, he was hung out to dry by his own defender, as Levi Colwill’s backpass put Jarrod Bowen clean through on goal. It’s only one game, but we’ll see how the Scandinavian (who has played for both Denmark and Sweden at youth levels) fares.

Fulham

Came back for a 2-1 win, their first at Newcastle since 2009. Raúl Jiménez stole the ball in midfield to start the attacking move for the first goal and then stroked home Antonee Robinson’s pass to finish it.

Tottenham Hotspur

They were thoroughly outplayed by Brentford, but they still won 2-0 on the road thanks to an own goal off a corner kick and Son Heung-min’s defense-splitting pass to Pape Sarr. Spurs are Team Inconsistency. Not fun for their fans, but fun for neutral supporters.

Everton

Was it Leicester’s defending or some confluence of the planets that caused the goal-shy Toffees to score four? Whatever it was, the Goodison Park faithful haven’t had many occasions to cheer like that this season. How about that pass from James Tarkowski that sliced open Leicester’s entire midfield to give Abdoulaye Doucouré his second goal?

Southampton

In a battle of the two teams at the bottom of the standings, the Saints picked up a precious win at Ipswich after 13 games without a victory. Could they possibly save themselves from the drop? Even if it is too late, it’s refreshing to see them on this half of the feature.

Premier League losers from Matchday 24

Manchester United

Soccer people are comparing them to the Liverpool teams of the early ’00s, living off their past glories. I think they’re more like the Dallas Cowboys, the plaything of a homegrown billionaire who’s wedded to an outmoded way of winning. Hang on, I think I might have just described the United States of America, too.

Aston Villa

Last week I made a crack about Villa’s fading hopes for attaining Champions League play next year, but maybe the CL is itself to blame for their fall in the standings. Their Premier League record in games following Champions League matches is six points out of a possible 24, including the latest, a 2-0 loss to their Midlands neighbors at Wolverhampton. The defeat could have easily been heavier with better finishing by Wolves. Villa really could have used some reinforcements during the transfer window, but even if the just-loaned Marcus Rashford gets back to his 2022 form, that won’t solve all of Villa’s issues.

Manchester City

When Erling Haaland equalized early in the second half, both City fans and neutral fans must have thought, “Here they come.” Oh, but this year’s City is not last year’s or the year before’s, and Arsenal blasted them for a lopsided win. Stefan Ortega’s performance in goal likely had City fans pining for the days of Zack Steffen, and the turnovers by Manuel Akanji and Phil Foden are an argument that City shouldn’t have the ball in its defensive third.

Brighton’s defense

Any time you give up seven goals in a game, that’s rough. It wasn’t even to some high-priced elite offense, but to Nottingham Forest’s, whose advanced metrics suggest that they’re not that good. Bart Verbruggen’s giveaway for the last goal was particularly bad. The last time the Seagulls lost this badly, our country only had 48 states.

Justin Kluivert

Liverpool’s defense did very well to cool off a hot Bournemouth attack, but the Dutchman had a chance to tie the game up at 1-1 and instead shanked his shot in front of a yawning goalmouth. That will be one of the misses of the season. Loser-within-a-loser notice goes to Team USA’s Tyler Adams, who had a solid game for the Cherries but got nailed in the head in stoppage time by a shot from his teammate Dean Huisjen. Hope he woke up the next morning with his head clear.

Jhon Durán

The move of the winter transfer window was the Colombian striker leaving a Champions League side in Aston Villa to play in the Saudi desert at Al-Nassr. No doubt he’ll earn a lot more money there, but he’ll be playing alongside the decomposing remains of Cristiano Ronaldo in front of crowds that don’t break five digits in a place where everything fun is illegal and players have to commute for hours just to get to practice. Even the Dallas Mavericks’ front office is struggling to comprehend this move. Well, Durán is only 21. Young people make mistakes.