Arkansas QB Brandon Allen is going to have to get himself a new rig after his truck was reportedly burned up by an arsonist early Monday morning.
Fayetteville police say Allen’s Chevy Avalanche was burned on the 1100 block of West Hendrix Street and they are investigating the incident as arson.
The truck was parked in a driveway but ended up rolling across the street into a ditch, cops say. Allen himself discovered the burning truck when the vehicle’s alarm went off, awaking him from slumber.
Arkansas coach Bret Bielema would offer no comment on the matter as it remains an ongoing investigation. He did confirm that no one was hurt.
Everyone may be fine physically but Brandon Allen can’t be feeling too good emotionally this morning, knowing that his sweet rig was burned up by some cowardly arsonist.
What kind of person goes around setting people’s trucks on fire anyway? That is truly a weak move.
Punch a man in the face, sure. Take a run at his woman, fine. Steal his Playstation, all right. But do not, under any circumstances, do anything to a man’s truck.
Don’t scratch his truck. Don’t ding it. Don’t scuff it. Don’t scrape it. Definitely don’t set it on fire.
In Arkansas, that might actually be a hanging offense. Attacking a man’s truck in Arkansas is basically the same thing as going after his penis. It’s an act of wanton mutilation.