Ranking the 10 ugliest NFL uniforms of all time

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1. Tampa Bay’s Creamsicle Uniforms

The ‘70s were a strange time for us all. I was not alive then, mind you, but I do own the DVD box sets of both I Love the ’70s and I Love the ’70s: Volume 2, which pretty much makes me an expert on the social climate of that turbulent decade; thus I am confident in stating that whoever designed those Tampa Bay uniforms was probably really, really high. High on drugs.

There is no world in which that putrid shade of orange is at all acceptable. No, not even in the psychedelic world revealed to your inner eye after you ingest a “magical” sugar cube sold to you by some ancient bearded dude named Froggy, a jolly but shifty-eyed man who swears on his personal Bible — a dogeared copy of a Carlos Castaneda book — that he almost obtained his PhD in chemistry before The Man stepped in and harsh’d his research mellow. That shade of orange — a shade somewhere between “creamsicle” and “sun-bleached candy corn” — is just that bad.

Of course, it does not help that the Buccaneers were dreadful during their two decades of sporting those awful jerseys. Perhaps we would more fondly remember those uniforms if the team managed to avoid, say, losing 26 consecutive games. But if you are going to be aggressively unstylish in life, you better at least be successful — *cue all my engineering friends nodding* — and Tampa Bay spent years and years about as far from success as possible.

(But hey, at least the team’s new uniforms are … uh … well …)

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