NBA Tank Rankings: Cleveland Cavaliers make an appearance

The NBA season is coming to a close, and that means there’s a run on the tank bank. Don’t look at it. It’s hideous.

It’s a heck of a time to be alive as an NBA fan. On the other hand, no it isn’t.

It’s beneficial to be reminded that one’s alive because this is, in my really awesome opinion, the least fascinating time of the year. Is the experience of right now close to being dead? Maybe. But you’re not dead, so deal with it.

The problem with tanking is that it’s generally frowned upon. It happens, but it’s one of those things people don’t want you to know about. You want the chicken nuggets, but you’re not supposed to know about how they shove live chickens head first into a laser grater to get that perfect, chunky texture.

The Lakers have, unfortunately, pulled themselves out from the tank rankings by resolving a bus-full of distractions in the past week. They’re out. But there are five spots in these rankings, and you can bet every last ounce of patience you have that each and every one is occupied, even number four. Especially number four.