Fansided

What can pizza preference tell us about the NBA Finals?

By Jeremy Lambert

NEW YORK, NY - OCTOBER 16: A view of pizza at a chef station at Ronzoni's La Sagra Slices hosted by Bongiovi Brand pasta sauces
NEW YORK, NY - OCTOBER 16: A view of pizza at a chef station at Ronzoni's La Sagra Slices hosted by Bongiovi Brand pasta sauces /
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Cleveland and the Bay Area are two distinct areas of the country with distinct tastes and preferences. What can their pizza choices tell us about the NBA Finals?

Eating a slice of pizza fulfills multiple food group requirements, making it the best food on the planet. How you top your pizza says a lot about you. Just cheese says, “I don’t trust the ingredients used by this company so I’m sticking with the basics.” A bevy of meats says, “I’m a man.” Anchovies says, “I have no intention of kissing anyone tonight.”

The fine folks at Slice, a mobile app that allows you to order local pizza, sent in the following data that tells you everything you need to know about Warriors and Cavaliers fans.

Most popular toppings in each city:

• Cleveland: 

1. Italian Sausage

2. Black Olives

3. Banana Peppers

• San Francisco: 

1. Black Olives

2. Pineapple

3. Canadian Bacon

Here’s what this information tells us:

Cavs fans are mad and salty, but still have last season. They’re eating Italian sausage instead of regular sausage because they need a little spice in their life after watching the first two games of the Finals. Black olives are disgusting and when you eat them, you make that bitter face. The same face the entire NBA made on July 4. Banana peppers say that they’re not too upset because they didn’t blow a 3-1 lead last year.

Warriors fans are relaxed. For them, black olives are an indication that they are bitter because the team hasn’t won every playoff game by 20+ points. Also, they blew a 3-1 lead last year. Pineapple and Canadian bacon are the main ingredients of a Hawaiian pizza, which is the most laid back pizza you can consume. Warriors fans know there is nothing to worry about. They’re just going to enjoy their pizza and turn the game off at halftime.

Top 3 Most popular non-pizza products:

• San Francisco 

1. Caesar Salad

2. Greek Salad

3. Wings

• Cleveland:

1. Wings

2. Wings

3. Wings

Cavs fans simply don’t care. They are going to stuff their face and make a mess because what’s the point of basketball anymore? Warriors fans are just being pretentious. “Let me eat a salad during a basketball game,” said no one worth hanging out with. Those that order wings are just trying to cover for the rest of the fanbase. They are a credit to DubNation.

Next: The 10 greatest mustaches in NBA history

Happy pizza eating, Finals fans.

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