The ultimate guide to watching the World Cup at work

4. So you’re in food service

This isn’t easy. One way or another, you’re going to have to manufacture a viewing area. That can mean watching on your smartphone, flipping a TV in the dining area (if you’re fortunate enough to have one of those) to the proper channel, or getting some sort of USB streaming device and attaching it to one of those monitors that display the orders in the back. One way or another, you’re going to have to make an extra effort.

Luckily, no one in food service cares if you’re distracted. Everyone who has worked in fast food, casual dining or a place with multiple Michelin stars know that no one gives any amount of attention to what they’re doing. Those who make dishes properly are hazed without remorse, and they’re weeded out before long.

One time I worked at McDonalds. I didn’t but pretend that I did. This was the same day that Clerks 2 came out, so all 32 of us decided to close the store down early and go see it for a nice matinee showing. That’s what we said anyway. Everyone just kind of went and did their own thing. The store manager went to the showing, as did a couple of the most recent hires, but that was about it. Trent took a nap in his car. Melissa went to play paintball. I went home to play Super Mario RPG on an emulator until I remembered I didn’t like that game. Then I took a nap too.

When everyone found their way back to the store in a couple days, no one noticed. The same customers were there, eating the same food, with the same dead expression in their eyes. We realized at that point we were invincible.

So yeah, do whatever you need to do. It doesn’t matter.