Presenting the 2018-19 Premier League Anti-Awards (so far)

The Premier League anti-awards take a look at some of the worst statistical achievements in the English top flight.

Not everything that can be counted, counts. But when it comes to assessing a soccer player’s impact, or lack thereof, it’s not a bad place to start. Inspired by Ian Levy’s work at Nylon Calculus, these are the Premier League anti-awards.

They’re a numerical look at who has been having a shocker this season, and there are plenty of candidates. This is the first time we’ve done these mid-season, so certain entry criteria will have been loosened compared to the 2016-17 and 2017-18 editions. However, you can rest assured these players are all worthy of the ‘Underachiever and proud’ Bart Simpson t-shirts we’ll be sending them.

The Stewart Downing Award

This award goes to the player who has taken the most shots without scoring a goal. Stewart Downing took a miserable 72 shots without finding the back of the net for Liverpool in 2011-12.

Our champion in this category is ahead by six shots. What makes matters worse for his team is that the runner up is from the same club. Laurent Depoitre may have been hapless in front of goal this season, but our winner is Huddersfield’s Steve Mounie.

The man from Benin was the Terriers’ top scorer last term. As they’re currently the lowest scoring team in the division, they could definitely do with him and Depoitre waking up. Five teams have taken fewer shots than Huddersfield but their finishing this season has left a lot to be desired.

The Christian Benteke Award

This award goes to the player who misses the largest proportion of their clear-cut chances. Benteke missed 20 out of 23 (87 percent) last season. Players have to waste at least 10 clear-cut chances to be considered here.

If you know the likelihood of a shot being scored – it’s expected goal value, in other words – it’s possible to run a simulation to see how likely it is that a batch of shots find the back of the net. Doing this with 10 Opta-defined clear-cut chances reveals there is just a one percent chance that an average finisher would miss them all.

And yet that is exactly what Gabriel Jesus did earlier this season. Having scored 13 of his 27 golden opportunities in 2017-18, it shouldn’t be possible, simulator or no simulator. Yet that’s what happened with his first 10 this season.

Jesus redeemed himself somewhat by converting two against Everton recently. However, missing one in injury time in City’s 3-2 defeat to Crystal Palace showed he isn’t out of the woods for the season just yet.

The Eden Hazard Award

This award goes to the player with the lowest proportion of the chances they created classified as clear-cut. Players must create at least 25 chances to enter here.

It has always seemed odd that Eden Hazard has dominated this award in the past. Yet those days appear to be over. The Belgian has already created 13 clear-cut chances this season, which is more than he mustered in the previous two campaigns combined. Still, there’s still five months to go in 2018-19, so we won’t rename the award just yet.

We might have to if Andros Townsend’s form continues though. Just one of the 29 chances he has created this season has been deemed as clear-cut. The England international may have scored belters against Manchester City and Burnley recently, but his assists column definitely needs some work.

The Martin Olsson Award

This award goes to the player with the division’s lowest cross completion rate, with 50 attempts the benchmark for entry. Olsson completed just 14 percent of his crosses in 2017/18.

When it comes to soccer statistics, we’re usually just counting. Is it better to focus on quantity or quality? Our winner could argue that a lack of accurate crosses doesn’t matter if you assist a goal on the rare occasion that you do find a teammate in the penalty box.

Chelsea’s Marcos Alonso has attempted 58 crosses in the Premier League this season. How many do you think have been received by a fellow Blue? Just four, giving him a pitiful seven percent completion rate.

However, one of those four found Pedro in the Crystal Palace penalty area in early November, and he scored to ensure Alonso got his third league assist of the season. That’s all well and good, but the Chelsea left-back is going to have this award named after him if he doesn’t up his game in 2019.

The Yannick Bolasie Award

This goes to the player who completes the lowest proportion of dribbles attempted, from those who’ve tried at least 50. Riyad Mahrez has won this title for the last two seasons. 

Our runner up is perhaps something of a surprise. Tottenham Hotspur’s Lucas Moura has completed just 38 percent of his take-ons so far this season.

But our champion has attempted 11 more than Moura while only completing an extra three. Step forward Josh Murphy of Cardiff City.

Aside from 131 minutes with Norwich in 2013/14, this is Murphy’s first proper season in the Premier League. Only 11 players completed more dribbles than he managed to in the Championship last season, but he hasn’t been so prolific this term. There’s no shame in that, though this award might be called ‘The Josh Murphy’ in future years.

The Joshua King Award

This award goes to the player who most often loses the ball due to poor control. The players considered here have all done so at least 40 times.

Some awards in this round up have different players in the running in every edition. Not this one. Last season’s victor, Salamon Rondon, has made poor touches more regularly in 2018-19, but isn’t our winner this time.

Then there’s Josh King, the eponymous hero of this section. The Bournemouth forward hasn’t matched his award-naming mark of one bad touch for every 11.5 touches that he registered in 2015-16, but he is in our top six.

One of King’s fellow Cherries has done even worse; approximately one in eight of Callum Wilson’s touches have been bad. As he’s equaled his best goals tally in the Premier League already this season and played for England, I doubt he’s too bothered that he has won this prize.

The Chico Flores Award

This award goes to the defender who wins the lowest proportion of his aerial duels. It is named in honor of Swansea’s Spanish center-back Chico Flores, who won 51 percent of them in 2013-14. Players must contest at least 75 aerial duels to be in contention.

“I challenge thee to a duel, sir” is presumably what soccer players have to say when they try to beat an opponent to a header. A slap with a leather glove would be going too far, I accept that. Who wouldn’t want to see it happen though?

For every duel won in soccer stats, a duel is lost. The average win rate is therefore obviously 50 percent, so for a defender to be below that figure is less than optimal. And despite not having one under the half way mark previously, this time we have two.

Crystal Palace’s James Tomkins has emerged triumphant from just 48.4 percent of his aerial duels. However, Bournemouth’s Nathan Ake has won just 41 of the 78 he has contested so far this season. I’ll leave you to figure out the percentage; you have to put some effort in, you know.

The Carl Jenkinson Award

This award goes to the defender who most frequently gives away penalties and scores own goals. Carl Jenkinson did so every 329 minutes in 2015-16. Players must give away at least one penalty, and score at least one own goal to be considered for this award.

Federico Fernandez won this trophy last time out, but he’s been doing well at Newcastle so he isn’t in the running for 2018-19. Yet.

When compiling these awards, it always feels bad to include young players. They’re trying to make their way in the game, so the last thing they need is overweight, middle-aged men like me casting scorn upon their performances.

But the numbers don’t lie, and so our award goes to Timothy Fosu-Mensah who is on loan at Fulham from Manchester United. Not only has he won this, but he’s taken it in spectacular style.

His last Premier League appearance was on 5th November. He scored an own goal, which turned out to be the winner, was booked, and subbed at half-time. Ouch. The week before, against Bournemouth, he conceded a penalty in the 14th minute which set the Cherries on the road to a 3-0 win.

So not only has he won this award, he’s done so within his last 122 minutes of league action. That’s quite some going.

The John Ruddy Award

This award goes to the goalkeeper who has made mistakes most frequently. Norwich’s John Ruddy made a mistake every 128 minutes in 2015-16. Players have to have seen at least 1,000 minutes of pitch time to be included.

The Anti-awards have been proven scientifically to be a powerful motivational tool. Consider, if you will, the case of Huddersfield Town’s Jonas Lossl. The Dane took this prize home in 2017-18, but hasn’t made a single qualifying mistake yet this season. Coincidence? I hardly think so. Once you’ve won one of these babies, you don’t want to come back.

To prove our point, let’s see if winning the mid-season award inspires Bernd Leno to up his game. The Arsenal man hasn’t yet fully adjusted to life in England: three errors which have lead to goals, and he has failed to claim five crosses he has attempted to gather too. No eligible goalkeeper can top either figure, so Leno is a worthy winner here.

The Shinji Okazaki Award

Our final award goes to the player who has been substituted in the highest proportion of his starts, with a minimum of 10 required to qualify. Okazaki was hauled off in 19 of his 20 starts in 2016-17.

When Chelsea sold Thibaut Courtois to Real Madrid, they managed to snag Mateo Kovacic on loan for a year as part of the deal. This was seen as a decent sweetener on the part of the Blues, but it seems that he doesn’t yet have the full trust of Maurizio Sarri.

Why do I suspect this? Kovacic has been subbed off in all 12 of his Premier League starts to date. His time on the pitch is getting shorter too; four of his first six starts lasted 79 minutes or longer, but only two of the subsequent six have been longer than 67 minutes. Still, he’s got himself this award and a Bart Simpson t-shirt. Could be worse, Mateo?

That concludes our mid-season anti-awards. To our winners, I say: get the hell out of here, and don’t let me see your ugly faces in May, alright?