Man who delivered Michael Jordan’s ‘Flu Game’ pizza says MJ is lying

A Utah man claiming he delivered the infamous ‘Flu Game’ pizza says Michael Jordan is blaming the wrong people for getting sick.

If you cross Michael Jordan, you get crossed over. Sliced and diced. Flensed for your pelt. And now that His Airness knows the name Craig Fite, he might just resolve never to rest until the most infamous pizza guy in the history of the multiverse receives that ruthlessly Jordanesque brand of justice.

Fite came forward this week to declare himself as the man who delivered a pizza to MJ in Utah the night before Game 5 of the 1997-98 NBA Finals against the Jazz, the one and only “Flu Game.” And while the Bulls icon insisted in ESPN’s “The Last Dance” that the pizza gave him food poisoning (among other claims), Fite is straight-up calling him a liar.

In an appearance on 1280 The Zone sports radio in Utah, the former Pizza Hut employee gave his side of the story, which is diametrically opposed to the one told by Jordan and his inner circle. He pushed back against the food poisoning claim, declaring that if MJ really was befallen by such an illness, it “100 percent” wasn’t from the pizza in question.

He also calls into question everyone’s recollection of the night versus what actually happened, as a means of starting to poke holes in the theory Fite and his pizza were to blame for Jordan’s illness.

“The crap story [Jordan’s trainer told], that there was five people, there was two of us — and I didn’t even have that many people working at the time at the store — but there was two of us,” Fite said.

Additionally, as Fite noted in a Facebook post last week, “it was my first delivery for the store and I remember both of us were hoping to meet some of the players.”

Be careful what you wish for, Craig.

We can all understand someone out there trying to dispel possible myths for the sake of posterity, but remember who you’re dealing with here: Michael Jeffrey Jordan, the most maniacally vengeful human being in the history of maniacs, vengeance, humans, and beings.

He probably already has your home address. He’s probably booked a charter flight to Utah right now.

You know you’re gonna have to beat him in blackjack, right? Picture Max von Sydow playing chess with the devil, then multiply it by 23. That’s what you’re dealing with here.

We may just have to make a whole new documentary.