Mike Locksley’s big hat mayo bath coronation means big things for Terps in 2023

Maryland head coach Mike Locksley took his Mayo Bowl mayo bath coronation like a champion.

Nobody is cooler than Big Hat Mike Locksley taking his majestic Mayo Bowl victory bath in stride.

It may have been an ugly game vs. North Carolina State, but Maryland is cooking up something mighty tasty under Coach Locksley in College Park. Although it took a few years, and a Tagovailoa, to start winning games in The Shell, we are strongly advising you to Fear the Turtle heading into 2023. It may not be the Year of the Tortoise on the Chinese Zodiac, but the Terps are to be feared.

Fortunes improved dramatically for Shane Beamer after taking last year’s Mayo Bath to the dome, bro. As for Paul Chryst who thought he was above this most sacred tradition, he now finds himself out of a job at his alma mater. That stank on him has lasted fortnights longer than what Duke’s Mayo Bowl victor Locksley will carry with him into the new year. Embrace the Year of the Turtle.

Not only did Locksley let the watered-down, lemony, egg-white concoction cascade down his face like Evey Hammond coming alive in the rain outside of the Shadow Gallery, but you can hear the sounds of the 1812 Overture playing in the back of your mind for sure. As was the case with DJ Andy Dufresne, it is in your head, but the fact the mayo bath was cut with Old Bay is even spicier!

By being a good sport about it, Locksley’s 2023 Terrapins are so going to be the 2022 Gamecocks.

Mike Locksley’s big hat mayo bath coronation, a program-defining win for Terps

Assuming Taulia Tagovailoa sticks around for one more season, Maryland has a serious Heisman Trophy contender at quarterback. Although the Terps play in the Big Ten East with the likes of Michigan, Michigan State, Ohio State and Penn State, who is to say that with the good fortunes of turtle power on their side that they cannot knock off their equivalents of Tennessee and Clemson?

See, Locksley has used the Nick Saban coaching rehabilitation clinic to his advantage. He was a guy who could not win games in New Mexico. Now he is winning the most sacred mid-tier bowl games called by Brock Osweiler and being a champion of the third most popular condiment out there. You factor in the fact he is wearing a big hat, and Locksley is an advertisement of greatness!

You’re either elite or you’re not. It is really just that simple. Locksley has always been able to recruit. The DMV does offer quite an underrated pool of high school talent. The University of Maryland is THE Under Armour school. All it was going to take was for a few of those L’s to turn into W’s. Now we are looking at Maryland’s next Bobby Ross or the even next Ralph Friedgen.

Should you cut Locksley, you will see that he only bleeds Maryland red, Duke’s Mayo and Old Bay.

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