Micah Parsons makes Cowboys trade pitch Jerry Jones definitely won’t pay for

The Dallas Cowboys' 2024 season ended with a dull thud. A 23-19 loss to the Marcus Mariota-led Washington Commanders, settling Dallas' record at 7-10. Not exactly how Jerry Jones drew it up after all his summertime smack talk.

There isn't a single NFL owner who cherishes the spotlight more than Jerry. He does own "America's team," after all. The Cowboys are at the center of NFL culture, whether they deserve it or not. Folks expect Dallas to contend accordingly. When the owner talks so frequently about all the money he's pouring into the team — and about all the money he can't spend as a result — it's only natural for pressure to match.

Dallas shelled out historic contracts to Dak Prescott and CeeDee Lamb late in the offseason, which makes their subsequent failure sting even more. The Cowboys can't help Prescott's injury. That's bad luck. But how bad Dallas looked before the highest-paid QB of all time got hurt? That is a tad more worrisome.

There is only so much the Cowboys can do to improve the team if Jones isn't willing to spend on the margins. It's clear he will break the bank for his stars, but the Cowboys neglected the supporting cast in a major way last summer in order to maintain the flexibility to splurge on Prescott and Lamb. Micah Parsons' extension is on the docket next, so the Cowboys aren't really a candidate to spend much elsewhere this upcoming offseason.

The cycle of mediocrity will continue. Just don't tell Parsons.

Micah Parsons laughably pitches a blockbuster Tyreek Hill trade to improve Cowboys

Ask the Cowboys' Pro Bowl linebacker how to improve the roster, and he'll tell you a golden opportunity just arose.

Miami Dolphins wideout Tyreek Hill effectively requested a trade on Sunday after missing the playoffs.

"I’m opening the door. I’m out bro."

Parsons wants the Cowboys to jump at the chance to acquire football's most explosive playmaker.

It's a compelling idea on paper. Hill, due $28.7 million next season, would surely welcome the absence of state income taxes, not to mention the upgrade at quarterback. Miami's offense has been extremely kind to Hill, but Tua Tagovailoa is essentially the NFL's most acclaimed system QB. His chemistry with Hill is well-documented, but the Dolphins could never get over the hump in the postseason, in large part due to Tagovailoa's inability to improvise under pressure.

Dak Prescott, when he's healthy, can flirt with the MVP trophy. The Cowboys might look vastly different next season on the schematic front — Mike McCarthy's future is finally in serious doubt — but Prescott's talent and composure will not fade. Lining up opposite Lamb can't hurt either. Hill would benefit from Lamb's gravitational pull and the attention required to cover the breadth of Dallas' pass-catching options.

The only issue? That aforementioned $28.7 million price tag. Hill is an expensive wideout, and his next contract won't provide much relief. There's just no way Jones and the Cowboys front office will even attempt to "justify" the expense. Not with Lamb soaking up $34 million annually at the same position.

If the Cowboys couldn't splurge on a league-average running back in one of the best running back markets in recent memory, there's absolutely no reason to believe Jones will break his own trend to trade for Hill.

We can chalk this one up to a fun hypothetical and nothing more.