Kevin Love’s father passed away two days ago. I don’t like thinking about what that must feel like for him. I know he had some time to be with him and prepare, but still. In my own case, I’ve only very recently felt like the person I am and the person I want to be are close enough to actually seem familiar to each other.
This version of me is only really getting to meet my dad. I want this version of me to be forming new memories with members of my family. I want those memories to last awhile, to inform our lives and directions going forward. The idea of having that not happening sucks. I don’t like it.
So, I don’t know how Kevin Love feels right now. Not good, I would assume. He posted a beautiful message on Instagram the other day, so he seems to be processing it, but… man.
It’s times like this you rely on your support system, to be close with people who, if they can’t empathize with your grief, know you well enough to truly sympathize.
Kevin Love and Tristan Thompson share a moment on the court
I get the feeling that despite some amazing matchups, despite some incredible showings from top teams, and despite the Pistons winning a game, this video is going to be the thing from the playoffs that sticks with me most.
There are a lot of pretty horrid traps people fall into when it comes to the idea of masculinity or what’s powerful or what’s “alpha,” or “beta,” or “sigma,” or whatever. A lot of these concepts or predispositions seem to ignore a very simple truth: if you hold your emotions in you torture yourself your whole life, explode in random moments or internalize things in a way that really messes up how you perceive the world, and die early. I’m not really sure what the benefits of most of them are.
But here are two dudes (one, in Kevin Love’s case, who has been quite open about his mental health journey during his playing career) openly expressing support and love in the middle of an NBA arena. And it’s not just a quick thing like:
“You good, man?”
“Yeah, I’ll be alright.”
These two were teammates for six years. They went on four runs to the NBA Finals together and won in 2016. I get the feeling you form a bond through series like that. Now Kevin is lucky enough to have people like Tristan Thompson to lean on in what’s probably going to be a top-ever worst moment in his life. It doesn’t undo what he’s going through, but it’s a cushion.
That, at the very least, is really cool.