Travis Kelce, in case you haven't heard, is dating pop megastar and international icon Taylor Swift. They appear very happy together and her presence at football games has been warmly received by most reasonable people.
Now, the Chiefs are back in the Super Bowl for a fourth time in five years. Swift is performing in Tokyo the night before the game as part of her historically successful 'Eras Tour,' but a favorable time zone difference should allow her to attend the big game.
If there's one thing that's flying more than Taylor these days, it is conspiracy theories related to Taylor. They are everywhere and no mere mortal can escape them. The latest T-Swift galaxy brain revelation revolves around the lucky number 13.
Here is a brief explainer from Twitter personality O'Shea Jackson Jr., who went to great lengths to unravel this mystery.
Explaining the Taylor Swift '13' Super Bowl conspiracy theory
So, what does '13' mean in relation to Taylor Swift? A lot, apparently.
First, her birthday is Dec. 13 and she turned 13 on Friday the 13th, so there is a deep personal connection for her. It is inherent to her place on the great cosmic clock we all occupy. Her first album? Well, it went 'gold' in 13 weeks. She won her 13th Grammy last week. Coincidence? Absolutely. Completely. I think? Thankfully for my naturally incurious mind, the Swifties are digging deeper. There are forces we cannot comprehend at work here.
Sunday's game takes place on Feb. 11, also displayed as 2/11 — and for those with a mathematical mind, yes, that does add up to 13. It is also Super Bowl LVIII, A.K.A Super Bowl 58. Okay class, break out your calculators again. Five plus eight equals... 13.
Swift has been dating Kelce since early August. That has allowed her to attend 12 Chiefs games to date. The Super Bowl will be — that's right — her 13th NFL game since converting to the Chiefs fandom.
Now, time for more math. And no, I don't know how this applies or is even remotely relevant, but again, I can't claim to know the ways of the universe. 100 percent is, well, 100 percent. That is a full thing. One cannot exceed 100 percent of something. Not in life, at least, in the physical realm. Well, if you subtract 13 from 100, you get 87. That is Travis Kelce's number. Clearly the comsos brought them together. Fate has intervened. It is all very complex.
Who are the Chiefs playing in the Super Bowl? The San Francisco 49ers, and dammit, you know what four plus nine equals. What about Brock Purdy, the opposing quarterback? What number does he wear? Yes... 13.
Now, how will Taylor get to the Super Bowl? By flying from Tokyo to Las Vegas, which takes roughly 13 hours when factoring in customs. Holy. Smokes.
What does it all mean? Well, I don't know, to be honest. Does this mean the Chiefs are destined to win? That Taylor Swift is secrently performing the halftime show with Usher? Or, maybe it's a secret curse, and the 49ers — the team of cumulative 13 — will play spoiler.
This is all way beyond me, beyond the plight of the common man. This is the rough equivalent of gazing upon the monolith in 2001: A Space Odyssey. We have entered the black hole at the end of Interstellar. We simply aren't advanced enough to understand it all.